I've been trying to get on here for ages - such a long time since I've been on that I forgot my login details.
Mum passed away 2 weeks ago - absolutely devastated - don't think I've even accepted it. Was with her the day before she went (28th July) for my birthday and she kept kissing me. Didn't go up for the early visiting the next day as was intending on going to the hospital for the 6:30 shift but I missed her because she passed away at 6pm - she was in there for breathing problems and was unwell for sometime- didn't open her eyes for more than 2 weeks.
Feel so guilty for not being there - so typical as I was there every other day.
Sat with her in the chapel of rest for the whole day before the funeral but just cant believe I wont see her again. Can't go back to the house because I bought it for her and it doesn't feel right.Staying at my sisters empty house at the moment as she is on holiday.
Doctor has put me on Temazapan which dont seem to be working - still off work.
Everything seems so pointless now - just want to be with my mum - don't think I will be able to go without her.
Gonna go now cos sobbing my eyeballs out again but would appreciate any comments.
Oh yes - does anybody know if COAD (Chronic Obstructive Airways disease) can be caused by air fresheners / candles / incense - Think I might be responsible because was always spraying/ burning candles to make the house smell ok because mum became doubly incontinent.
Thanks
x
Mum passed away 2 weeks ago - absolutely devastated - don't think I've even accepted it. Was with her the day before she went (28th July) for my birthday and she kept kissing me. Didn't go up for the early visiting the next day as was intending on going to the hospital for the 6:30 shift but I missed her because she passed away at 6pm - she was in there for breathing problems and was unwell for sometime- didn't open her eyes for more than 2 weeks.
Feel so guilty for not being there - so typical as I was there every other day.
Sat with her in the chapel of rest for the whole day before the funeral but just cant believe I wont see her again. Can't go back to the house because I bought it for her and it doesn't feel right.Staying at my sisters empty house at the moment as she is on holiday.
Doctor has put me on Temazapan which dont seem to be working - still off work.
Everything seems so pointless now - just want to be with my mum - don't think I will be able to go without her.
Gonna go now cos sobbing my eyeballs out again but would appreciate any comments.
Oh yes - does anybody know if COAD (Chronic Obstructive Airways disease) can be caused by air fresheners / candles / incense - Think I might be responsible because was always spraying/ burning candles to make the house smell ok because mum became doubly incontinent.
Thanks
x