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Mum believes my dad is still alive


New member
May 20, 2022
Thanks for all the contributions, which I have found to be most helpful. I am new to the forum and joined to get some advice as my mum (recently turned 87) is starting to be affected by memory problems, something which has slowly become worse over the last 6 - 12 months. I was especially interested in this thread as Mum's main memory problem is either occasionally thinking that I am Dad (who passed away 15 years ago) or she will recognise me as her son, David, but she thinks Dad is still alive and has just gone out of the room or has gone out for a walk. Mum didn't have this problem until very recently. I do have some physical resemblance to my late father, but up to now this never caused her to get me and Dad mixed up. At the moment the problem isn't too severe and she doesn't get too upset when I correct her to say I am in fact David, not Dad. Other times, when she will ask me "have you seen Dad?" I just go along with what she is thinking and say "I haven't seen Dad" or "Dad's not here at the moment". This seems to deal with the problem, but I do worry that she will get frustrated at the answers I give her. My Mum lives alone in a flat, but receives two carer visits (of two hours each per day), but I am usually at her flat for 3 or 4 nights per week, so I think she gets a fair amount of mental stimulation. She likes to read and watch TV and can hold a (mainly) normal conversation.
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