Moving house

Noggin the Nog

Registered User
Mar 11, 2010
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0
Can anyone give me any information or experience about the effect of moving house one someone with dementia, please
 

Norrms

Registered User
Feb 19, 2009
5,631
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Torquay Devon
Hello

Hello Noggin The Nog (Great name by the way) and a great series as well LOL . Just wanted to say welcome to TP and i`m sure somebody will be along soon with some helpful advice. I`m supposing it depends on what stage of dementia they are but moving is stressful at the best of times for anybody, best wishes, Norrms and family xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
 

Sandy

Registered User
Mar 23, 2005
6,847
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Hi Noggin,

Welcome to Talking Point (TP) from me also.

Maybe if you could give us a bit more detail about the person with dementia and the circumstances/reasons for the move we could give you some more specific feedback?

I think most people will say that a move will result in increased confusion, at least for a while, but it really depends on the person with dementia.

Also, sometimes a move is required for the person to live closer to relatives and get more support or to move into some sort of sheltered housing scheme. It might be in those cases that the trade-off between increased support vs. increased confusion will have to be weighed up.

Take care,
 

nellen

Registered User
Mar 17, 2009
96
0
Derbyshire
Hello Noggin my mum has alzh and has just moved house - its not been easy at all. The added complication is that my brother died at 52 very suddenly and unexpectedly just over 5 weeks ago.

I knew the flats were being built and thought they might be good for my mum as they have 24/7 care on site and plan to have lots of activities on site too. I'd been to see them and spoke with the manager and care manager

Shortly after my brother died my mum got an offer of a flat in this scheme and i really didn't know what to do as i thought the upheaval would be too much for my mum after losing her son.

Then, because of my brother dying and the effect on my mum and her alz, her social worker and the day centre manager decided to have a care review meeting which included the CPN and me and mum and i mentioned the offer of the flat (its called an Extracare scheme) and they all thought it was a good idea for mum despite all that had happened and suggested that she gets some extra support to help her get settled into her new flat - which i thought was a v good idea.

I think what Sandy said is a good point: that the trade-off between increased support vs. increased confusion will have to be weighed up.

My mum is in her new flat now she IS more confused BUT my brother lives 5 minutes walk away and she has carers going in to her 3 times a day - her whole care package has been reviewed- she goes to a day centre 4 days a week and as the activities at the scheme get up and running as the scheme reaches full occupancy within the next week i will gradually reduce the day centre days down to 2 days a week so that she can get involved more at home.

The move was confusing for her but all the time throughout it she was positive that she wanted to move - despite her alh, she knew that in her previous sheltered housing flats the other tenants were more capable of leading independent lives than her and that she was 'further along that line" than them.

So, all in all - despite my stress and a few more grey hairs i'm glad i did it - so is my brother - BUT with support for transition. My mum does seem to be happier and once the next few weeks of transition are over i think she will be much better off - i look forward to seeing her sat out on her patio in the communal courtyard eating Cornetto and holding court in the sun.
 
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sallyc

Registered User
Aug 20, 2008
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suffolk
Hi. I help care for my grandad. Last year he moved from yorkshire to suffolk to be near all of us. As sandy said we were advised not to move him but the trade off between him being at home 200 miles from us all, living on his own, and being here albeit a bit more confused but with our support has been well worth it. He's still living on his own, he has deteriorated, but i think he would have anyway. This time last year my dad had been to yorkshire 8 weekends out of 10 trying to sort out the mess grandad had got into during the week. Now we can share his care between me and my parents and, as he inevitably gets worse, we can increase what we do and make his life the happiest it can be. That's just our story but, as others have said, it depends on your circumstances. I'd love to hear more about you. Take care. Love sal x
 

Noggin the Nog

Registered User
Mar 11, 2010
2
0
Replies to query about moving house

I had to wait for my daughter to visit from Australia to find out how to access the replies to my thread because I have found the website very difficult to understand and find my way around. That is why I have taken so long to respond to your kind replies.

I realise that everyone is different with different levels of disability. My husband has moderate dementia, as far as I can find out, his mobility is very poor indeed, his hearing is very poor and he has little sight in one eye. The reason for even considering a move is because of steps and stairs in our house and the thought that a bungalow might be much more suitable. However, I had heard that moving house can cause more anxiety and confusion and I am reluctant to expose him to that.

Thank you all for taking the trouble to reply and for your kind remarks. Thank you, Norrms for your good wishes. Thank you Sandy for the welcome. I am so sorry, Nellen, to hear of all the stress you have been under and the sad news of your brother's death. It must have been a terrible time. I can quite understand the trade off between more confusion and increased support. What a lucky man your grandad is, Sallyc, to have such a kind and caring granddaughter as you. It is good to think of him being close to you all and what a relief for your father not having to make the journey all that way to sort things out. Thank you all. Noggin the Nog