Mother recently diagnosed with vascular dementia

Discussion in 'Recently diagnosed and early stages of dementia' started by Mike89, Mar 11, 2019.

  1. Mike89

    Mike89 New member

    Mar 11, 2019
    4
    Hello I’m new too this site and also dementia as a whole, my mother age (66) was diagnosed with vascular dementia after having a few strokes. Well I guess i should start from the beginning and give a bit of history, back in 2011 my mother had a mild heart-attack no surgery was needed, as I was only 21 roughly at the time I’m not exactly sure what they had given her, ( I was at home with her when this happened) she had numbness in Her arm and it was sore so I called 911 they took her to the hospital and gave her something I’m not sure what but she was better after that, than back in 2013 she has a stroke ( I’m not sure what type but I know she had one maybe a TIA? Not sure) than things were fine and life carried on as it always does than back in late 2015 early 2016 she got into cocaine, the why’s and how’s im not really too sure but she was hooked for I’ll say a year and a half maybe 2 years, she finally stopped after she had had an episode called
    Drug-Induced Psychotic

    Or at least that’s what i was told by the emergency department at our local hospital, she was having hallucinations so on and so forth, after she had quite and things were better, we had always been living in a basement apartment for the 2 years and dealing with loud and nasty neighbors we were fighting with them over the noise and taking out stuff so there was definitely stress involved for the time we were living there, so now we’re on to the first stroke that I’m at least aware of which happened on September 15th 2018, she was asleep at the time and I head her wake up and screaming for me she was telling me her body was numb and I of course took her to hospital she has another TIA stroke (multiple ones across the front of her forehead), a few days later she was released from the hospital and the numbness went away while she was in the the hospital, now skip one mouth exactly it’s two days before her birthday October 15th, I didn’t realize that she was having a stroke for the next 2 days I just assumed her was tired and she kept counting and she was laying in my bed and I thought maybe she was tired so I let her sleep, (woke her up a few hours later made her food) she was still very out of it and dazed I’ll say still didn’t think anything of it, ( when she came back for. The hospital she would have moments of confusion so that’s what I had thought this was) I was very wrong, she had happen to have a scheduled appointment for her diabetes on the date of her birthday oct 17th, we went and the doctors and nurses thought she was having a mild seizure, it turns out that the last two days she was home with me she was having a big stroke and I wasn’t aware of it ( I did the F.A.S.T) test and she was able to do them all so that’s why I didn’t think she was having a stroke, we go to the hospital and over the course of a month she’s being tested CT scans and everything else, that’s when I find out she has vascular dementia, and skip a few months into the new year my mother is in a nursing home and being cared for, but she seems to be giving up, she can’t walk anymore, she she can feed herself but needs help, can’t pee or care for herself like she once could before any of this happened, and now she’s also screaming out for me constantly and she have had a few falls in the home, trying to get out of bed and get up, she’s also leaning forward constantly about to fall, and when I go to see her she’s can’t even keep a conversation doing anymore it’s very sad and depressing. I’m not sure how far along she is in the dementia but it seems to be getting worse very fast, is this normal?, I’m at a loss I have 3 other sisters and two of them live in other part of the world ones in England and the other is in USA, when I go to see her they want to talk and see her on FaceTime and I of course do it, it’s just hard for me to see my mom like this and also I know that their being strong for their little bro ( I’m the youngest) but I know it’s coming that she will eventually pass away and I don’t even know how to deal with this let along that. I’m wondering is her leaning forward and her screaming out for me a sign that she’s getting worse, we’re waiting for a new set of CT scans to tell us what is going on but I just don’t know how to handle this.
     
  2. Mike89

    Mike89 New member

    Mar 11, 2019
    4
    I should also note, that my mom is very unaware of what’s going on around her, she can’t really speak and when she does she’s just yelling for anybody I try to help her but it doesn’t work, is this a sign of late stages?
     
  3. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    10,716
    Female
    South coast
    Hello @Mike89 and welcome to Talking Point.

    I was so sorry to read about your mum

    Vascular dementia (Im assuming that this is what she has) tends to progress in "steps" and some of them can be quite large. It sounds to me at though your mum has just had a large step down in her condition :(
    Yes, it sounds to me as though your mums dementia has now reached the severe stage. Im afraid that quite a few people with advanced dementia do vocalise a lot - often just calling "help" - and many of them are not aware that they are doing it. I have seen someone at mums care home calling "help" even when someone was with them. Have you talked to the care home manager about how they can help her distress? Sometimes medication can help to calm them.
     
  4. karaokePete

    karaokePete Registered User

    Jul 23, 2017
    5,020
    N Ireland
    Hello @Mike89, welcome from me too.

    That is a lot to deal with. I was wondering if someone may be able to give you contact details for your local Alzheimer's support network if you say where you are located.

    You don't seem to live in England. However, if you live elsewhere in the UK you can do a post code check for support services by following this link https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/find-support-near-you

    Maybe contact with our Helpline would assist, details are as follows
    National Dementia Helpline
    0300 222 11 22
    Our helpline advisers are here for you.
    Helpline opening hours:
    Monday to Wednesday 9am – 8pm
    Thursday and Friday 9am – 5pm
    Saturday and Sunday 10am – 4pm

    Or, on-line advice is available in the UK if you follow this link https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/national-dementia-helpline/live-online-advice
     
  5. Mike89

    Mike89 New member

    Mar 11, 2019
    4
    The nursing home she’s in have begun playing her favourite music and I’ve also played it whenever I go and see her, she doesn’t seem to have any reaction to the songs anymore like she used to only 3 months ago, is this normal for vascular dementia to come on so suddenly, she was diegnosed back in November 2018 and it’s only been a few months can she already be in the late stages? The nursing home have been calling me almost daily to tell me that she’s fallen while trying to get out of her bed, it’s the 5th or maybe more time now, is that also what happens to people with vascular dementia will try to get out of bed?, she was living at home with me and I was taking care of her with the help of PSWs coming into the home (after she was released back in November) she never tried to get out of bed while she was living with me, but now she seems to keep trying and she’s fallen quite a lot, the family and I have requested to have a new CT scan done to help get a better understanding of how far she’s progressing. I just thought it would not be this fast.
     
  6. Mike89

    Mike89 New member

    Mar 11, 2019
    4
    Update: after months of dealing with this, my mom was sent to Toronto rehabilitation centre for constant yelling (my name) she seemed to be getting worse back in (April 2019) is when she stayed there for 4 months than went back to her nursing home she also has had a few UTIs as of late, now fast forward to October, moms been in the nursing home and seems okay for the month she was there, was recently sent to emergency for another UTI while in hospital she wasn’t really eating and unable to swallow foods, now she went back to the home they (to my understanding) got rid of the uti only to be sent 4 days later 16th October, now she has on top of not being able to swallow any food or liquids (coughing and chocking) and just unable, she now has a yeast infection or so I’m told, I went to see her yesterday and she never made eye contact with me her head was down (off to the side) her awareness was gone/missing from her, wasn’t even speaking, nor eating/drinking, when I saw her than she looked half dead ( just not the person I remember her to be) I’ve seen her a lot since she’s been in the nursing home and to/from hospital etc... but this was just a shock!, now the hospital is running an MRI at my request to give me and my family I better understanding if this is the Dementia or another stroke, as of now there is no real update to give I guess just needed an outlet, but she’s not doing well, I’m told that this yeast infection can cause this (everything except the swallowing) or so I’m told waiting on tests.
     
  7. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    10,716
    Female
    South coast
    It is very hard when they get to this stage. Mum had a lot of infections and also a stroke in her final year and often the body closes down quite slowly. It could be a stroke, or it could be end stage dementia. I think you need a very open and frank conversation with the doctors
    (((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))
     
  8. Bunpoots

    Bunpoots Registered User

    Apr 1, 2016
    3,203
    Nottinghamshire
    I’m sorry you’re both going through this at such young ages. Sending virtual strength
     
  9. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,751
    Kent
    Any infection seems to have much more serious effects on people with dementia than on others. It`s difficult to understand but it seems so.

    Your mother is very young for this and it must be really difficult for you.

    Please take as much support as you can get.
     

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