More holiday experiences

Sue741215

Registered User
Oct 18, 2019
443
0
I have just been on a coach holiday for a few days, my first but want to recommend the idea for others living with dementia.
We are lucky to have a local coach company who pick up across the road from where we live so just trundled our suitcase along. It was a long journey taking 7 hours with a few local pickups and a couple of stops on route but my oh is calm on journeys so I was able to relax and it didn't seem like 7 hours. On arrival we were given our room keys as we left the coach and our luggage was delivered to our rooms after we had used the lifts to our rooms. A bit of persuasion needed to OH to let them deal with the bags but otherwise an easy transition. For dinner we were seated on a table of 9 which was great for me as I had others to talk to and OH had a lovely man next to him who attempt conversation despite Oh's responses bearing no resemblance to the questions. Hopefully the others on the table didn't find OH too disruptive - two ladies were widows who had experienced living with dementia and everyone was really lovely to us. There were 2 other couples on other tables each with one partner having dementia which was comforting. We had trips out each day with stops for free time but it was good that we could return to the coach early as OH got anxious about missing it. All in all it as a very relaxing holiday.

Not of course without its mishaps - one night I dropped off while reading in bed and suddenly heard the room door closing. I leapt out of bed and went out to find Oh looking for the loo. Yes - you've guessed it the door locked behind us and we were locked out in our pjs. I took a moment to give thanks that I was wearing a lovely (and respectable) pair of satin pjs, a christmas present from my sister and OH had some new M&S pjs. Nevertheless I was not looking walking into reception wearing them. I hung around the lift a bit praying someone would appear - thankfully 2 lovely ladies appeared and phoned reception for us and even let oh use their loo! Next night I put a chair in front of the door and the keys ready to grab by the door but did manage to catch him the next night. To be fair the door was unfortunately just where our ensuite door is at home.

Other problems were him wanting to pack to go home after one night, trying to order coca cola at breakfast as well as at dinner, him coming into the ladies loo to find me and me leaving my mobile phone in a cafe and having to rush back about a mile to recover it.

What a relaxing holiday it was compared to others I have written about. There were 30 plus really lovely people on the coach all of whom were ready to listen to Oh's joke, keep an eye on him while I visited the loo and not least tell me how wonderful I was at looking after Oh - I must have put up a good front!

So if you are wondering about holidays give a coach holiday a try especially if you can find a local company - I will certainly be looking for another trip and hoping to meet some of the same people as many of them seem to be regulars. Apologies again to those who are unable to make trips any longer but I write to encourage those who may be uncertain to give it a try and hopefully you will experience the kindness and support that I did.
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
25,511
0
Southampton
I have just been on a coach holiday for a few days, my first but want to recommend the idea for others living with dementia.
We are lucky to have a local coach company who pick up across the road from where we live so just trundled our suitcase along. It was a long journey taking 7 hours with a few local pickups and a couple of stops on route but my oh is calm on journeys so I was able to relax and it didn't seem like 7 hours. On arrival we were given our room keys as we left the coach and our luggage was delivered to our rooms after we had used the lifts to our rooms. A bit of persuasion needed to OH to let them deal with the bags but otherwise an easy transition. For dinner we were seated on a table of 9 which was great for me as I had others to talk to and OH had a lovely man next to him who attempt conversation despite Oh's responses bearing no resemblance to the questions. Hopefully the others on the table didn't find OH too disruptive - two ladies were widows who had experienced living with dementia and everyone was really lovely to us. There were 2 other couples on other tables each with one partner having dementia which was comforting. We had trips out each day with stops for free time but it was good that we could return to the coach early as OH got anxious about missing it. All in all it as a very relaxing holiday.

Not of course without its mishaps - one night I dropped off while reading in bed and suddenly heard the room door closing. I leapt out of bed and went out to find Oh looking for the loo. Yes - you've guessed it the door locked behind us and we were locked out in our pjs. I took a moment to give thanks that I was wearing a lovely (and respectable) pair of satin pjs, a christmas present from my sister and OH had some new M&S pjs. Nevertheless I was not looking walking into reception wearing them. I hung around the lift a bit praying someone would appear - thankfully 2 lovely ladies appeared and phoned reception for us and even let oh use their loo! Next night I put a chair in front of the door and the keys ready to grab by the door but did manage to catch him the next night. To be fair the door was unfortunately just where our ensuite door is at home.

Other problems were him wanting to pack to go home after one night, trying to order coca cola at breakfast as well as at dinner, him coming into the ladies loo to find me and me leaving my mobile phone in a cafe and having to rush back about a mile to recover it.

What a relaxing holiday it was compared to others I have written about. There were 30 plus really lovely people on the coach all of whom were ready to listen to Oh's joke, keep an eye on him while I visited the loo and not least tell me how wonderful I was at looking after Oh - I must have put up a good front!

So if you are wondering about holidays give a coach holiday a try especially if you can find a local company - I will certainly be looking for another trip and hoping to meet some of the same people as many of them seem to be regulars. Apologies again to those who are unable to make trips any longer but I write to encourage those who may be uncertain to give it a try and hopefully you will experience the kindness and support that I did.
im glad you had a really nice time. makes all the difference when other people are nice and supportive. seems to work for your oh.
 

Cardinal

Registered User
Oct 4, 2023
226
0
I love your travel posts. They’re as close as I’m going to get to traveling. I imagine myself on the trip.
 

Sue741215

Registered User
Oct 18, 2019
443
0
I love your travel posts. They’re as close as I’m going to get to traveling. I imagine myself on the trip.
Thankyou @Cardinal as I worry about people who can no longer travel- not sure I will be as positive as you when it is my turn but glad it gives you some enjoyment. You may like to hear about another pyjama story. I was ill in bed yesterday feeling really sick and tired. I couldn't face cooking a meal for OH so ordered fish and chips from my bed. Oh decided to go and meet delivery driver but of course missed him so I had to go along the street and find him in my pjs. I thought it was rather ironic that it was me wandering the streets in pyjamas and not him. I wish you all the best and I'll let you know about my next holiday - I'm sure OH will do something to amuse us bless him.
 

sdmhred

Registered User
Jan 26, 2022
2,673
0
Surrey
And why could he not have coca cola for breakfast? 🤣🤣

I did a coach holiday with my late Dad and there was a couple where the chap had dementia on our table. They both enjoyed the holiday too.
 

Sue741215

Registered User
Oct 18, 2019
443
0
And why could he not have coca cola for breakfast? 🤣🤣

I did a coach holiday with my late Dad and there was a couple where the chap had dementia on our table. They both enjoyed the holiday too.
As he has coca cola for lunch, dinner and whenever possible in between I drew the line at breakfast - not least because we went on a coach trip after breakfast and he is never satisfied with one drink so I'm sure you can see the problem. I veer between thinking he should cut down as it is not good for him and thinking oh well he should have what he wants. I'm glad to hear that others with dementia enjoy coach holidays.
 

Agzy

Registered User
Nov 16, 2016
3,980
0
Moreton, Wirral. UK.
I have just been on a coach holiday for a few days, my first but want to recommend the idea for others living with dementia.
We are lucky to have a local coach company who pick up across the road from where we live so just trundled our suitcase along. It was a long journey taking 7 hours with a few local pickups and a couple of stops on route but my oh is calm on journeys so I was able to relax and it didn't seem like 7 hours. On arrival we were given our room keys as we left the coach and our luggage was delivered to our rooms after we had used the lifts to our rooms. A bit of persuasion needed to OH to let them deal with the bags but otherwise an easy transition. For dinner we were seated on a table of 9 which was great for me as I had others to talk to and OH had a lovely man next to him who attempt conversation despite Oh's responses bearing no resemblance to the questions. Hopefully the others on the table didn't find OH too disruptive - two ladies were widows who had experienced living with dementia and everyone was really lovely to us. There were 2 other couples on other tables each with one partner having dementia which was comforting. We had trips out each day with stops for free time but it was good that we could return to the coach early as OH got anxious about missing it. All in all it as a very relaxing holiday.

Not of course without its mishaps - one night I dropped off while reading in bed and suddenly heard the room door closing. I leapt out of bed and went out to find Oh looking for the loo. Yes - you've guessed it the door locked behind us and we were locked out in our pjs. I took a moment to give thanks that I was wearing a lovely (and respectable) pair of satin pjs, a christmas present from my sister and OH had some new M&S pjs. Nevertheless I was not looking walking into reception wearing them. I hung around the lift a bit praying someone would appear - thankfully 2 lovely ladies appeared and phoned reception for us and even let oh use their loo! Next night I put a chair in front of the door and the keys ready to grab by the door but did manage to catch him the next night. To be fair the door was unfortunately just where our ensuite door is at home.

Other problems were him wanting to pack to go home after one night, trying to order coca cola at breakfast as well as at dinner, him coming into the ladies loo to find me and me leaving my mobile phone in a cafe and having to rush back about a mile to recover it.

What a relaxing holiday it was compared to others I have written about. There were 30 plus really lovely people on the coach all of whom were ready to listen to Oh's joke, keep an eye on him while I visited the loo and not least tell me how wonderful I was at looking after Oh - I must have put up a good front!

So if you are wondering about holidays give a coach holiday a try especially if you can find a local company - I will certainly be looking for another trip and hoping to meet some of the same people as many of them seem to be regulars. Apologies again to those who are unable to make trips any longer but I write to encourage those who may be uncertain to give it a try and hopefully you will experience the kindness and support that I did.
Have to admit to being more than a tad envious as, before Mr Alz moved in, Pauline and I enjoy lots of such coach trips even getting as far as the Outer Hebrides and we loved them. Sadly she just won’t countenance any coach trip as the toilets aboard are just too difficult for her to access and impossible if she needs assistance. Have to say though that if that could be overcome I would be back on the coach tour circuit with pleasure, even the day trips run by our local dementia group and Age UK.
 

Cardinal

Registered User
Oct 4, 2023
226
0
Have to admit to being more than a tad envious as, before Mr Alz moved in, Pauline and I enjoy lots of such coach trips even getting as far as the Outer Hebrides and we loved them. Sadly she just won’t countenance any coach trip as the toilets aboard are just too difficult for her to access and impossible if she needs assistance. Have to say though that if that could be overcome I would be back on the coach tour circuit with pleasure, even the day trips run by our local dementia group and Age UK.
I could be wrong but I thought I read awhile back that after Pauline was no longer able to go on trips with you, you went on trips by yourself. If that’s correct what did you do about Pauline? I’m guessing she was still ok to leave on her own with someone checking on her. How did you decide when you could no longer leave her on her own?

I’m asking because my husband’s memory clinic has said since he’s still early stages it’s safe to leave him on his own, for a few days, if someone checks on him each day.
 

Kazza5

New member
Sep 2, 2023
9
0
I have just been on a coach holiday for a few days, my first but want to recommend the idea for others living with dementia.
We are lucky to have a local coach company who pick up across the road from where we live so just trundled our suitcase along. It was a long journey taking 7 hours with a few local pickups and a couple of stops on route but my oh is calm on journeys so I was able to relax and it didn't seem like 7 hours. On arrival we were given our room keys as we left the coach and our luggage was delivered to our rooms after we had used the lifts to our rooms. A bit of persuasion needed to OH to let them deal with the bags but otherwise an easy transition. For dinner we were seated on a table of 9 which was great for me as I had others to talk to and OH had a lovely man next to him who attempt conversation despite Oh's responses bearing no resemblance to the questions. Hopefully the others on the table didn't find OH too disruptive - two ladies were widows who had experienced living with dementia and everyone was really lovely to us. There were 2 other couples on other tables each with one partner having dementia which was comforting. We had trips out each day with stops for free time but it was good that we could return to the coach early as OH got anxious about missing it. All in all it as a very relaxing holiday.

Not of course without its mishaps - one night I dropped off while reading in bed and suddenly heard the room door closing. I leapt out of bed and went out to find Oh looking for the loo. Yes - you've guessed it the door locked behind us and we were locked out in our pjs. I took a moment to give thanks that I was wearing a lovely (and respectable) pair of satin pjs, a christmas present from my sister and OH had some new M&S pjs. Nevertheless I was not looking walking into reception wearing them. I hung around the lift a bit praying someone would appear - thankfully 2 lovely ladies appeared and phoned reception for us and even let oh use their loo! Next night I put a chair in front of the door and the keys ready to grab by the door but did manage to catch him the next night. To be fair the door was unfortunately just where our ensuite door is at home.

Other problems were him wanting to pack to go home after one night, trying to order coca cola at breakfast as well as at dinner, him coming into the ladies loo to find me and me leaving my mobile phone in a cafe and having to rush back about a mile to recover it.

What a relaxing holiday it was compared to others I have written about. There were 30 plus really lovely people on the coach all of whom were ready to listen to Oh's joke, keep an eye on him while I visited the loo and not least tell me how wonderful I was at looking after Oh - I must have put up a good front!

So if you are wondering about holidays give a coach holiday a try especially if you can find a local company - I will certainly be looking for another trip and hoping to meet some of the same people as many of them seem to be regulars. Apologies again to those who are unable to make trips any longer but I write to encourage those who may be uncertain to give it a try and hopefully you will experience the kindness and support that I did.
I’ve found your post very interesting. I have been thinking about doing a coach holiday and now I think that I’ll look into it more. Having people on your coach who were quite knowledgeable with your OH condition must have been really reassuring. Are you aware of any coach companies who specialise in holidays for the disabled?
 

Izzy

Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
75,842
0
73
Dundee
Are you aware of any coach companies who specialise in holidays for the disabled?

I’ve no personal experience of these companies but I found them on the web. They may not be what you’re looking for of course!



 

Sue741215

Registered User
Oct 18, 2019
443
0
I’ve found your post very interesting. I have been thinking about doing a coach holiday and now I think that I’ll look into it more. Having people on your coach who were quite knowledgeable with your OH condition must have been really reassuring. Are you aware of any coach companies who specialise in holidays for the disabled?
Hi @Kazza5. No sorry I am not aware of any specialising in dementia though you may find some dementia groups arrange their own. I suspect it is a format that suits carers in that they have others to talk to and it is nice to not have to think about everything - just go with the itinerary. I am lucky enough to have a very local company who only pick up locally so if you can find one in your area I would give them a call and they will perhaps tell you that they have other customers with dementia. Not that I would worry too much about that - everyone on my holiday was so kind to us. Coach holidays are also good in that you can find short trips - I find that about 5 days is best for us. If you are not sure our local company also does day trips - if you can find similar this may be a good way to test the water. I hope you find something to suit you and enjoy your holiday together.

I don't know if you are aware of Dementia Adventure holidays where you stay in a house in a group of about 8 and there is a team to take you out in a minibus and generally support you and your partner to do activities. It is expensive even though it is subsidised but I believe they may reduce the charges if you cannot afford it. You also need to get yourselves there and as they tend to be in the countryside you may need a car to get there. I have booked one later in the year and will post about how we get on.
 

Sue741215

Registered User
Oct 18, 2019
443
0
Have to admit to being more than a tad envious as, before Mr Alz moved in, Pauline and I enjoy lots of such coach trips even getting as far as the Outer Hebrides and we loved them. Sadly she just won’t countenance any coach trip as the toilets aboard are just too difficult for her to access and impossible if she needs assistance. Have to say though that if that could be overcome I would be back on the coach tour circuit with pleasure, even the day trips run by our local dementia group and Age UK.
Sorry to hear that @Agzy. There was a toilet on our coach but we did not need to use it as we made frequent stops (3 stops on a 7 hr journey)- I don't think they wanted you to use it except as an emergency and agree with you that it looked a bit precarious for people with less mobility. I totally sympathise with Pauline's worries though - there is nothing worse than wanting a toilet that isn't available even without Mr Alz being a factor
 

Agzy

Registered User
Nov 16, 2016
3,980
0
Moreton, Wirral. UK.
I could be wrong but I thought I read awhile back that after Pauline was no longer able to go on trips with you, you went on trips by yourself. If that’s correct what did you do about Pauline? I’m guessing she was still ok to leave on her own with someone checking on her. How did you decide when you could no longer leave her on her own?

I’m asking because my husband’s memory clinic has said since he’s still early stages it’s safe to leave him on his own, for a few days, if someone checks on him each day.
Back then she could cope with most things and when she first started refusing to travel we didn’t have a diagnosis but agreed she would stay home and me travel which I was very grateful for. Funny enough it was her physical issues in needed a smaller car that ended my caravan travels as downsizing meant no towing; don’t half miss it even to this day.
 

Shem56

Registered User
Aug 31, 2020
144
0
I have just been on a coach holiday for a few days, my first but want to recommend the idea for others living with dementia.
We are lucky to have a local coach company who pick up across the road from where we live so just trundled our suitcase along. It was a long journey taking 7 hours with a few local pickups and a couple of stops on route but my oh is calm on journeys so I was able to relax and it didn't seem like 7 hours. On arrival we were given our room keys as we left the coach and our luggage was delivered to our rooms after we had used the lifts to our rooms. A bit of persuasion needed to OH to let them deal with the bags but otherwise an easy transition. For dinner we were seated on a table of 9 which was great for me as I had others to talk to and OH had a lovely man next to him who attempt conversation despite Oh's responses bearing no resemblance to the questions. Hopefully the others on the table didn't find OH too disruptive - two ladies were widows who had experienced living with dementia and everyone was really lovely to us. There were 2 other couples on other tables each with one partner having dementia which was comforting. We had trips out each day with stops for free time but it was good that we could return to the coach early as OH got anxious about missing it. All in all it as a very relaxing holiday.

Not of course without its mishaps - one night I dropped off while reading in bed and suddenly heard the room door closing. I leapt out of bed and went out to find Oh looking for the loo. Yes - you've guessed it the door locked behind us and we were locked out in our pjs. I took a moment to give thanks that I was wearing a lovely (and respectable) pair of satin pjs, a christmas present from my sister and OH had some new M&S pjs. Nevertheless I was not looking walking into reception wearing them. I hung around the lift a bit praying someone would appear - thankfully 2 lovely ladies appeared and phoned reception for us and even let oh use their loo! Next night I put a chair in front of the door and the keys ready to grab by the door but did manage to catch him the next night. To be fair the door was unfortunately just where our ensuite door is at home.

Other problems were him wanting to pack to go home after one night, trying to order coca cola at breakfast as well as at dinner, him coming into the ladies loo to find me and me leaving my mobile phone in a cafe and having to rush back about a mile to recover it.

What a relaxing holiday it was compared to others I have written about. There were 30 plus really lovely people on the coach all of whom were ready to listen to Oh's joke, keep an eye on him while I visited the loo and not least tell me how wonderful I was at looking after Oh - I must have put up a good front!

So if you are wondering about holidays give a coach holiday a try especially if you can find a local company - I will certainly be looking for another trip and hoping to meet some of the same people as many of them seem to be regulars. Apologies again to those who are unable to make trips any longer but I write to encourage those who may be uncertain to give it a try and hopefully you will experience the kindness and support that I did.
 

Shem56

Registered User
Aug 31, 2020
144
0
I have a coach trip booked for 3 days with a local firm. I thought it would work well with O/H but unfortunately , he has declared he is not going period. He thinks someone is out to kill him and it is safer for him at home. I will pack our two hand luggage bags and come Friday morning will see if he comes or not .
My neighbours are aware he may not come and will keep an eye out for him if he stays at home.
Just the thought of a few days away .......
 

maggie6445

Registered User
Dec 29, 2023
1,805
0
Hi @Sue741215 , a couple of friends from dementia club are going on a three day coach trip and want us to join them . My oh is doubly Incontinent and I'm not sure I can manage. Does your husband have these issues? If so how did you cope please?