Moods

[Monty70]

My dad who’s 82 has vascular dementia. It was getting to the point where there was always a problem to solve. Keys would disappear. My dad always going to the neighbours. Last year he did something to the boiler and in the end got a new one . He lives on his own and during co vid we had carers increased. I live 20 mins away. Thinking of my dad i decided to get a live in carer. Won’t be a long term fix. But my dad has these black moods. And yesterday he rang me to day he wasn’t happy.
I can’t cope with his black moods and i don’t even live with him.
i feel its made it worst.
i just feel its constant . I live on my own and Trying to cope with it all.
should my dad go in a home ?I feel so guilty........

 

[Louise7]

Welcome to the forum @Monty70 you'll find lots of helpful advice and support here. Have you spoken to the GP about your Dad's moods? Depression can be quite common with dementia, particularly in those with vascular dementia as they have more awareness of their condition than those with Alzheimer's. If your Dad won't see a GP you could still let them know about your Dad's moods - keeping a record of the type of things you are noticing would be helpful information for the GP too. There is medication available that can help, and this factsheet about depression with dementia may also be useful to you:

https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/about-dementia/symptoms-and-diagnosis/apathy#content-start

 

[TNJJ]

My dad who’s 82 has vascular dementia. It was getting to the point where there was always a problem to solve. Keys would disappear. My dad always going to the neighbours. Last year he did something to the boiler and in the end got a new one . He lives on his own and during co vid we had carers increased. I live 20 mins away. Thinking of my dad i decided to get a live in carer. Won’t be a long term fix. But my dad has these black moods. And yesterday he rang me to day he wasn’t happy.
I can’t cope with his black moods and i don’t even live with him.
i feel its made it worst.
i just feel its constant . I live on my own and Trying to cope with it all.
should my dad go in a home ?I feel so guilty........

Hi. My dad is 87 and has carers in 4times a day. I also support him but don’t live with him.
My dad also suffers from these black moods . I got his GP involved and they prescribed Mirtazapine. He is on 30mg at night. It seems to have helped . He still gets them but not so bad. I have LPOA for Finance and Health and Welfare. If you haven’t it may be wise to do so. It helps tremendously in the long run. ?

 

[nellbelles]

Hello @Monty70 and a warm welcome to DTP
I would advise you to think carefully about getting a live in carer unless you are going through an agency, becoming an employer organising cover etc can be be a big thing!
I hope now you have found the forum you will continue to post

 

[Monty70]

Hi. My dad is 87 and has carers in 4times a day. I also support him but don’t live with him.
My dad also suffers from these black moods . I got his GP involved and they prescribed Mirtazapine. He is on 30mg at night. It seems to have helped . He still gets them but not so bad. I have LPOA for Finance and Health and Welfare. If you haven’t it may be wise to do so. It helps tremendously in the long run. ?

Thank you for your advice ?