Mom went into the home yesterday

Discussion in 'ARCHIVE FORUM: Support discussions' started by sunset, Sep 2, 2007.

  1. sunset

    sunset Registered User

    Aug 23, 2007
    5
    I suppose the dreaded day still took the family by surprise when the ambulance took Mom form the hospital to the nursing home. The social worker and the Dr. felt this would be easier on all of us, and less stressful on Mom. You still walk around sorta of shocked by it all. Her last few weeks at home were a nightmare to say the least...each day became alittle harder than the other. But it gave me a firmer resolve to do the right thing for Mom. She is happily unaware her nurse told us of her true surroundings. Its the cleanest we"ve seen her, eating and everything...they are able to do things for her that we just weren't capable of doing. The Dr. told us we were doing the right thing for her at this time , they did not see her getting any better they felt she is on a swift decline. I actually feel relief that she is safe now, at home we never could keep up with her. She was into everything, everywhere, wandered upstairs to the attic...on the sides are bedrooms with very high floor level windows somehow this was open with the screen out! We nailed the door shut, but at night time she would try to wander into the fields at night(its her farm). I'm glad shes finally safe..........but I'll always miss the part of her that was my Mom. This is what pains me...missing pieces that can never be found again. Just sharing.....Sunset
     
  2. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,884
    Kent
    Take care sunset.
    I hope you`ll soon feel easier about your mother being in a home, and be able to enjoy visiting, knowing when you leave her she`s safe.
    It takes a lot of getting used to, but it`s so often the only alternative.
    Love xx
     
  3. Taffy

    Taffy Registered User

    Apr 15, 2007
    1,314
    Dear Sunset,
    I hope that everything works out well for you and your mum. Knowing that she is safe, is a big relief for you. Happily, unaware of her true surrounds is a blessing. It would be very pleasing to see that your mum is allowing them to care for her, I know with my mum she is more compliant with the home attendants then she was ever with me. I can relate to that feeling of losing the part that was your mum. Luckily, we have memories ( even though I know it's not memories we want). Fingers crossed it all remains positive. Take Care. Taffy.
     
  4. Nell

    Nell Registered User

    Aug 9, 2005
    1,170
    Australia
    Dear Sunset,
    Take comfort in the knowledge that this is the right thing for your Mum and that she could not have returned home. I know what you mean about
    This is what pains me...missing pieces that can never be found again.

    I think we all feel that way - at each stage there is another loss, another removal from the person that once was.

    The fact that she is safe and well looked after won't take that feeling away, but perhaps it helps to soften the blow a little.
    Take care of yourself too.
     
  5. dave b

    dave b Registered User

    Nov 21, 2006
    63
    staffs
    sunset
    i hope when i have to make this leap
    it goes as well as your's have in the normal? circumstances!
    sorry fo my'self time
    next week must start looking! ( or is this tomorrow never comes)
    dave xx
     
  6. elaineo2

    elaineo2 Registered User

    Jul 6, 2007
    945
    leigh lancashire
    Hi sunset,you have taken the hardest step anyone should have to take,yet sadly many have to take it.I think neil armstrong got the easier job of stepping on the moon!the missing pieces you mentioned brought a tear to my eye,not for me ,but for our loved ones who have pieces of their lives they no longer remember.Love to you and your family and best wishes to your mum.I hope she settles well and you can rest easy knowing she is getting the best care out there.love elainex
     

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