My mom has been deteriorating following a water infection in early January. She was discharged to a nursing home and was readmitted to hospital with sepsis, her kidneys are also deteriorating. Inflammatory markers were 584. Hospital are saying she is responding well to antibiotics, but I can see no improvement and she is finding the treatment very distressing. I am concerned that her quality of life is poor. She is doubly incontinent, has severe osteoporosis, is eating and drinking hardly anything, and yesterday was saying goodbye to me, and seemed delirious. I dont have POA and due to vascular dementia can't get that now. Can Drs insist they continue to treat her rather than just making her comfortable?
Mom has sepsis
- Thread starter Whitey2000
- Start date
Hi I don't have health lPA,but we had a visit at home where I care for mum and the nurse filled in a respect form which deals with wishes about treatment further along the line,can you speak to a GP for any advice about such matters
Dad was admitted to hospital with sepsis and suspected TIA...vasc dementia/Alz. I had poa health.... after a week of ABs and fluids no improvement. I sat with the very kind consultant and we had a very frank discussion and we both agreed that treatment should stop dad should go back to his NH for end of life which happened 8 days later. It is of course a hard discussion to have but most certainly the kindest to have had for dad. I didn't feel having poa made any difference on this occasion to having the discussion with the consultant and subsequent withdrawing treatment with dad's interests at the heart of it so I would say have a chat with your mum's dr/senior consultant and discuss yours and their thoughts.
I will have a chat to them, thank you. They are saying her oxygen levels have improved slightly and so has the infection but her overall condition is so poor and she was so upset. I think I will do as you did and see how she is after 1 week. Her poor arms are covered in bruises and they were unable to find any vein for her blood test today
Mom has been moved to a frailty assessment unit. The hospital tried to discharge her to the nursing home but they decided that her needs were too complex for them. She is sleeping most of the time, still has the infection and today started to refuse water. She is comfortable but it's heart breaking to see her literally fading away. 6 weeks ago she was fine. I want her at peace so much but am dreading the end when it comes and just hope she won't be distressed
((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) @Whitey2000
The unit should be able to keep her comfortable and pain-free.
Its the waiting thats the hardest thing
The unit should be able to keep her comfortable and pain-free.
Its the waiting thats the hardest thing
Thank you, she is comfortable at the moment, and hope she stays that way. It is so terribly sad.
The hospital and care home have made it so much worse. Everything has been a battle.
It's such a difficult time for you. It brings back memories of when my husband was declining rapidly in hospital. I still remember that horrible fear that gripped me everytime the phone rang. Thinking of you and wishing your mum peace.
Thank you, it's the most horrible feeling isn't it, I want her at peace and yet I dread the end
I think doctors are sometimes afraid of stopping treatment as such, and suggesting palliative care only, in case relatives become angry/indignant/upset. It might be worth asking them to say honestly what they'd want if it were their relative.
I had an aunt in her 80s with fairly late stage dementia who stopped eating and drinking after th umpteenth UTI. I was asked whether I wanted her taken to hospital and put on a drip, or (basically) left in the care home, where she would otherwise die.
It was a horrible decision, and I could only ask the very nice GP what he'd do if it were his much loved aunt. He said he'd leave her where she was, in the very nice care home, where they'd keep her comfortable. Hospital would be very distressing for her, and in any case it was only going to happen again in a few weeks or months, since she'd always been prone to UTIs.
I did feel that my aunt would not want to be kept going, given the sad state she was in anyway, so she stayed in the CH, where she nearly always seemed to be sleeping quite comfortably (I sat with her a lot) and continued to refuse food and drink, which were regularly offered. I think she'd just had enough.
She drifted away quite peacefully after about a week, and although it was a horrible decision at the time, I never once regretted it - I'm quite sure it was what she'd have wanted.
I had an aunt in her 80s with fairly late stage dementia who stopped eating and drinking after th umpteenth UTI. I was asked whether I wanted her taken to hospital and put on a drip, or (basically) left in the care home, where she would otherwise die.
It was a horrible decision, and I could only ask the very nice GP what he'd do if it were his much loved aunt. He said he'd leave her where she was, in the very nice care home, where they'd keep her comfortable. Hospital would be very distressing for her, and in any case it was only going to happen again in a few weeks or months, since she'd always been prone to UTIs.
I did feel that my aunt would not want to be kept going, given the sad state she was in anyway, so she stayed in the CH, where she nearly always seemed to be sleeping quite comfortably (I sat with her a lot) and continued to refuse food and drink, which were regularly offered. I think she'd just had enough.
She drifted away quite peacefully after about a week, and although it was a horrible decision at the time, I never once regretted it - I'm quite sure it was what she'd have wanted.
