Missing for half an hour!!!

Discussion in 'I have a partner with dementia' started by di65, Apr 17, 2015.

  1. di65

    di65 Registered User

    Feb 28, 2013
    768
    new zealand
    I had a very big fright yesterday. Early morning (about 8.30am) I had a visit from the owner and a care worker from Lex's daycare centre. The day before they had taken the able-bodied attendees out for lunch at a local Working Men's Club. They played pool and darts and were generally having a good time, when they noticed that Lex wasn't there. They checked the toilets (Lex is familiar with the Club's layout as it is where he goes to Rotary each week). They then went to the Police Station (which is situated next door) and reported him missing before getting the off duty carers mobilised to search for him. Fortunately he was found half an hour later about 2 kilometres away on the main road after negotiating the CBD, heading for our home (I presume - as it was in the same direction). They were very concerned,as this is the first time he has shown any inclination to wander. I don't blame them for his escape, as we all know how quickly this can happen. They suggested - and I have followed this up - that I get a locator for him. I went to the Police Station (same one) yesterday afternoon and spoke to them about them. The young lady I spoke to was the same one that handled the initial visit from the carers, so knew what I was talking about. She has arranged for the Search and Rescue man who deals with the locator alarms to come and visit us next week, as he is on leave at present. I am now more determined than ever that he MUST come with me whenever I leave the house, as obviously he has entered a new phase of this insidious disease :(:(
     
  2. AlsoConfused

    AlsoConfused Registered User

    Sep 17, 2010
    1,958
    Heartfelt sympathy. My Mum vanished once when there were two of us actually with her ... she was in a mood and snuck off while we were momentarily distracted. I wouldn't have thought it POSSIBLE for anyone to disappear while being so closely supervised.
     
  3. Beate

    Beate Registered User

    May 21, 2014
    11,481
    Female
    London
    OH once vanished from behind me on the underground. We were walking along the busy Northern Line platform that leads to the DLR and he decided to get on the Northern Line train when I wasn't looking. It was a nightmare as there is no mobile signal down there. I had to leave the underground and wait till he got overground on his train, then phone and instruct him to turn back, plus inform transport police who found and escorted him back.

    Another time he vanished from the cinema. He went to the loo and didn't come back! I found him after a while in the neighbouring screen where he sat on "our seats" at the back, happily watching a completely different film. That was the last time I let him go to the loo on his own. But these days he prefers to sit still and go in his pants anyway...
     
  4. di65

    di65 Registered User

    Feb 28, 2013
    768
    new zealand
    #4 di65, Apr 18, 2015
    Last edited: Apr 18, 2015
    Yes - the carers were amazed that he could vanish in plain sight. They normally have a 1-3 ratio on trips, but are looking at increasing that. I don't think that it will be necessary though, as if the person decides to go wandering, they seem to be able to do it regardless.
     
  5. Grey Lad

    Grey Lad Registered User

    Sep 12, 2014
    5,737
    North East Lincs
    My O H went missing for a short while this week. I dozed off in the lounge to find her missing. She turned up a short while later as she had been for a walk in her slippers. This is am improvement on the last episode when a kind lady returned her by car. I realise that dozing is a problem and that a locator needs to be considered. I would be interested to know what other people have experienced with these gadgets and if some are preferable to others.
     
  6. StephT

    StephT Registered User

    Apr 4, 2013
    25
    My OH has a MindMe locator which he has in a pouch attached to his belt. I find it very reassuring as he goes on his mobility scooter to get his paper from the local shops. As he likes to chat, I am able to track his movements on the computer and I know where he is. If I am concerned I can phone the help line and they will alert the necessary authorities and give them all his details.
     
  7. Beate

    Beate Registered User

    May 21, 2014
    11,481
    Female
    London
    We've got a Buddi tracker through the LA but it needs charging up each night, is slow to update position and is not very accurate. Plus, it obviously doesn't work indoors which sometimes also means the inside of buses. No GPS signal, no update.
     
  8. Grey Lad

    Grey Lad Registered User

    Sep 12, 2014
    5,737
    North East Lincs
    Thanks both for your experience of trackers.
     
  9. marionq

    marionq Registered User

    Apr 24, 2013
    5,550
    Female
    Scotland
    Last Wednesday John walked unnoticed out of his day centre while the rest were playing indoor bowls. From the bus ticket in his wallet I can see that he walked across a main road, kept on walking and then must have seen a bus with a destination on the front he recognised so got on. I returned from a trip with my grandson to find three messages on the answerphone and while trying to get my head round that the police called.

    The upshot is he is on the " at risk" register with the police who have sent a report to the Social Services and as they said this might lead to some more support. Who knows! He has got lost before but it is only when the police get involved that anyone is interested.
     
  10. LadyA

    LadyA Registered User

    Oct 19, 2009
    13,453
    Ireland
    Talk about an ill wind! Hope you do get some more support from it.

    Honestly though - it's like small children. When dau was tiny, she went missing in a department store one day. And I always made sure she was standing right in front of me, so couldn't understand how she'd wandered without me noticing! I was just getting frantic, calling her, looking around the immediate area, knowing that she certainly couldn't have got far - when I heard a distinct giggle coming from underneath a rail of jackets beside me! The little monster had slid under them to hide!:D
    My OH thankfully, only went walkabout I think it was three times. Once he climbed through a barbed wire fence and hedge into the neighbours garden and was creeping across the front of their garden trying to find a way out when their young daughter spotted him and alerted her mother. He couldn't have got out of their garden as they have electric gates to the front, and are bordered by fields with electric fences. And twice, while I was in the loo, he slipped out so quietly I didn't realise he was gone the first time - until I got a call from a neighbour who lives a mile away! He had found him on the road and taken him in for a cuppa. The second time OH had made his way down to the main road before I found him. Very worrying. So yes, di65, a tracker thingy sounds like a very good idea! It will give you a measure of peace of mind.
     
  11. di65

    di65 Registered User

    Feb 28, 2013
    768
    new zealand
    OMG - what neighbours! What on earth were they scared of:eek::eek:
     
  12. LadyA

    LadyA Registered User

    Oct 19, 2009
    13,453
    Ireland
    They're not scared of anything! :-D The leccy fences are around the fields surrounding them- to keep the cattle and sheep in! Cows aren't too bad, but sheep are the very devil for escaping if they can at all!
     

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