• Expert Q&A: Rare dementias - Tues 3 March, 3-4pm

    Our next expert Q&A will be on the topic of rare dementias. It will be hosted by Nikki and Seb from Rare Dementia Support. If you have any questions about rare dementias, they will be here to answer them on Tuesday 3 March between 3-4pm.

    You can either post your question >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll be happy to ask them on your behalf.

Mik1929

Mik1929

Registered User
Oct 2, 2014
19
I am 85 and MW is 84 and is in an advanced state of Alxheimers. For four or five years MW was very abusive, both verbally and physically. Eighteen months ago she was put on memantine and resperidone and the aggression has mostly disappeared but still surfaces when I ask her to do something that she does not want to do. This is particularly so in the evening when the carer comes to give her the medication and I ask her to let the carer get her into her night clothes. This is at about 8.30pm. If she does not get in her nightwear she goes off to sleep and when I try to get her to bed at about 10.0pm she is fast asleep and it takes ages to get her into bed. MW is now bed wetting on a regular basis and I wonder what is the next stage as she refuses to admit that she has AZ. Any ideas?
 

Cat27

Volunteer Moderator
Feb 27, 2015
10,669
Merseyside
Hello Mik :)

Ask your GP to refer you to the continence nurses & see what they can advise.

Buy waterproof covers for the mattress & waterproof sheets.
 

PollyP.

Registered User
Oct 8, 2009
327
Herefordshire UK
Hi Mik1929

You are doing extremely well looking after your wife considering you are both in your eighties.

As for the bed wetting, your doctor, the memory clinic or social services should be able to advise you and offer free pads and possibly sheets for the bed. I was offered help for my mum by the staff at the Memory Clinic.

I buy the Tena ladies pull up pants, they look very nice and your wife may think that they are just her normal knickers. You can get them in any of the large supermarkets or chemists.

As for your wife not admitting that she has Alzheimer's dementia. It is possibly the case with most sufferers, they cannot understand how they are acting and cannot remember things so definitely would not be able to admit to having dementia. I never ever mention the word Alzheimers to my Mum, neither do the care home staff.

I think that you should ask for more help, it isn't easy looking after some-one with dementia as well as the bed wetting.

Pauline
 

Mik1929

Registered User
Oct 2, 2014
19
Hi Mik1929

You are doing extremely well looking after your wife considering you are both in your eighties.

As for the bed wetting, your doctor, the memory clinic or social services should be able to advise you and offer free pads and possibly sheets for the bed. I was offered help for my mum by the staff at the Memory Clinic.

I buy the Tena ladies pull up pants, they look very nice and your wife may think that they are just her normal knickers. You can get them in any of the large supermarkets or chemists.

As for your wife not admitting that she has Alzheimer's dementia. It is possibly the case with most sufferers, they cannot understand how they are acting and cannot remember things so definitely would not be able to admit to having dementia. I never ever mention the word Alzheimers to my Mum, neither do the care home staff.

I think that you should ask for more help, it isn't easy looking after some-one with dementia as well as the bed wetting.

Pauline
Thank you polyp for your post. I have been in touch about MW's bed wetting and have had a great pile of the pants you mentioned. Unfortunately MW will not wear them yet although I am working on it. MW have just come to me for the third time this evening asking why she cannot go to bed in her day clothes so I reckon it wil take another hour to get her to bed. Happy days!
 

Margarita

Registered User
Feb 17, 2006
10,824
london
I am wondering if your wife would compermise with you .

In saying to her she can sleep in day clothes as long as she put pull up knickers .

Rather then ague with my mum

I would let her sleep in her day clothes
Put fresh day clothes on mum in the morning

Then mum got into routine with carers coming around .
Mum would let Carer change her into PJ.
Took mum ages , weeks to let carers change, wash her put her into PJ