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Messy Issue !!


Registered User
Sep 13, 2014
Sorry but hoping you can help.

My dad is now doubly incontinent but the messy stuff seems to only happen overnight. My problem is when I try to clean him in the morning it just doesn't seem to matter how much I wipe it just keeps coming...............sorry if it's too much information but thank God for TP as where else could you talk about this sort of thing !!

I have spoken to the doctor, district nurse and incontinence nurse but nobody seems to be able to offer me any advice. It's not overflow as he has been recently checked and there is nothing blocked up there.

It's starting to get me down as when I wash him in the morning it inevitably ends up everywhere......flannel, bed linen, towels etc.

Has anybody had any experience or could offer any advice ??

Many Thanks xx


Registered User
Dec 8, 2011
North West
It's really difficult to offer specific advice Stresshead as in this, as in so many other areas, everyone is different.

Clearly what you have to aim for is for his bowels to be opened during the day and, if possible, after his evening meal so that there will be nothing much left to emerge overnight. Not sure of his exact situation but does he have regular opportunities to sit on the loo shortly after finishing meals? To look at it positively, if he never, or only rarely, has accidents during the day that's a plus.

I found that drastically altering my wife's diet - it took many months to work out the best diet for her - was the key to improving the situation.
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Registered User
Apr 13, 2015
If his stools are firm during the day then could it be a diet issue as Stanley suggests? Just thinking that if he was having something like a milky drink before bed and is lactose intolerant (for example), it could be causing the loose stools for the morning. Sometimes fruit can cause a problem as well. Might be worth looking at what he eats from lunchtime onwards to see if there is a possible trigger.

If he is having loose stools all the time, do you have a dietician at his practice you could talk to and see if they can review what he is eating?


Registered User
Sep 13, 2014
Thank you for the replies.

What makes it more puzzling for me is that sadly dad is at the stage in this disease where he eats very little. I have had involvement from everybody about this but apparently it's not uncommon with people in the later stages of Alzheimers to go off food.

It's a daily battle to encourage dad to eat and he seems to survive on a couple of cups of tea, a slice of bread and jam and a trifle. Believe me it's not for the want of trying but he just won't eat anything else. That's why we thought he has maybe constipated.

The District Nurse has just been again and she is going to talk about it with her manager.


Registered User
Mar 4, 2012
I use disposable bed pads and disposable dry wipes for these incidents. They save on the washing and also reduce the hygeine risks.
I would say that drs and DNS don't seem to realise how serious these problems are. At one stage my husband was quite blocked up and ill but they both repeatedly told me he wasn't constipated because rectal exams showed nothing and his abdomen wasn't hard. It's not what the medics tell you, its learning to watch the consistency of the stool and administer medication when you have to.
I found as Stanley said, diet and a regular routine helped.
But I would definitely say use disposables if you can, it reduces the risks to you.
Any online incontinence shop will have what you need.


Registered User
Aug 15, 2015
I understand the problem with the eating as my mum is very similar.

When my brother had a colostomy bag if he had an upset stomach it obviously had repurcussions on a grand scale. The jam he has shouldn't have seeds in it, the bread should be white not brown. Tea or coffee also makes bowel movements happen so maybe not having a final cuppa before bedtime.

He was also told paracetamol, jelly babies and marshmallows always help to thicken things up a bit too. With my mum I found it helped her to take one anti diarrhoea tablet each morning, but maybe one at night time may help and they don't cause any harm and are easy to by over counter or supermarkets. Own brand cheaper of course.

Marshmallows you only need a few of or even a pink and white wafer they sell are pleasant to eat and help too. Even hardbody jellies work well. I used to give those to my dog when he had dementia as he had an awful problem bless him.

Good luck.


Registered User
Sep 13, 2014
Disposable bed pads are a good idea I'll have a look for some now and the DN is bringing me some wipes tomorrow.

Thanks for the advice......I guess it's just another little obstacle to overcome on this journey.



Registered User
May 21, 2014
He might benefit from something like Fybogel to add fibre to the diet and make bowel movements regular and neither too hard not too soft. OH is on repeat prescription for these.