My MIL lives alone. 18 months ago we became aware she was confused and having memory problems. We spoke to her GP who tested her and immediately referred her to the memory clinic. This caused her huge upset as she is in complete denial about having any problem. We were at the memory clinic for two hours and they tested her and I was told she definitely had a problem but had no medication issued. We were given some leaflets and sent on our way. After that appointment we got a letter saying she had Mild cognitive issues. After the appointment my husband and I became the enemy...because we were trying to make out she was "mad" and there is nothing wrong with her. She can no longer shop, manage her money or manage basic tasks such as cooking or cleaning and rarely leaves her house..If she did she would get lost. Her short term memory is very poor and she is confused a lot of the time. We go in daily to her. A year after her first appointment came another appointment from the memory clinic. She didn't want to go and we didn't encouraged her to go. Last time it caused huge upset...and they did absolutely nothing and we didn't even get a proper diagnosis...it was a waste of 2 hours and helped to destroy the trust she has always had in us. For the past 18 months no-one from the medical profession has shown any interest or checked she is okay despite her living alone and when I spoke to the G P this week because she didn't turn up for a blood test (she forgot and we didn't know about it) they hadn't even got it noted in her records that she has a problem. When someone has Dementia and they live alone will there be a point when the GP or social service may kick in. We do our best but are not professionals.
Memory Clinic and support
- Thread starter Amanda95
- Start date
Hello @Amanda95, you are welcome here.
It would be useful to get your MiL assessed again as around 40-50% of people with Mild Cognitive Impairment(MCI) will develop dementia. My own wife went from a diagnosis of MCI to one of dementia within a year.
It's common to come up against this resistance as the person with cognitive impairment can lose the ability to reason and so not realise they have a problem. Some members have contacted the GP and had the surgery issue a letter calling the person in for something like a well woman appointment as sometimes an official request for a routine examination will get the person in and then their cognitive ability can also be checked.
Apart from that a needs assessment can be requested and there is an AS Factsheet about that. The Factsheet refers to dementia but I think any person who isn't managing can request this. Anyway, here's a link to the factsheet https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/sites...assessment_for_care_in_support_in_england.pdf
If talking to an expert would help you could try the help line and the details are
National Dementia Helpline
0300 222 11 22
Our helpline advisers are here for you.
Helpline opening hours:
Monday to Wednesday 9am – 8pm
Thursday and Friday 9am – 5pm
Saturday and Sunday 10am – 4pm
It would be useful to get your MiL assessed again as around 40-50% of people with Mild Cognitive Impairment(MCI) will develop dementia. My own wife went from a diagnosis of MCI to one of dementia within a year.
It's common to come up against this resistance as the person with cognitive impairment can lose the ability to reason and so not realise they have a problem. Some members have contacted the GP and had the surgery issue a letter calling the person in for something like a well woman appointment as sometimes an official request for a routine examination will get the person in and then their cognitive ability can also be checked.
Apart from that a needs assessment can be requested and there is an AS Factsheet about that. The Factsheet refers to dementia but I think any person who isn't managing can request this. Anyway, here's a link to the factsheet https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/sites...assessment_for_care_in_support_in_england.pdf
If talking to an expert would help you could try the help line and the details are
National Dementia Helpline
0300 222 11 22
Our helpline advisers are here for you.
Helpline opening hours:
Monday to Wednesday 9am – 8pm
Thursday and Friday 9am – 5pm
Saturday and Sunday 10am – 4pm
Do try and get a diagnosis as a diagnosis of dementia can open doors to help and support.
As Kareokepete says, many people who have been diagnosed with dementia start off with a diagnosis of Mild Cognitive Impairment (MCI) and nearly half of those diagnosed with MCI develop actual dementia within a year. I would phone the memory clinic, explain the problem (they will have heard it many times before) and see if you can get another appointment, although you may have to go back to her GP for re-referral.
When you go for the appointment, dont refer to it as the Memory Clinic if this will cause problems, or you might like to say its an appointment to prove the doctor wrong and she that she is perfectly OK. You often have to resort to stealth to get them to appointments as they have lost their reasoning. I remember reading on her that one person said to their mum that she was going out for tea and cake and just called in to the clinic on their way............
If it is confirmed as Alzheimers then there is medication to slow down the progress, although if it is any other type of dementia, Im afraid that there is nothing for the dementia as such although there are drugs for various symptoms like anxiety, aggression and paranoia if this ever becomes a problem. Dont expect too much from the Memory Clinic, though - my mum only went to the Memory Clinic in order to get a diagnosis and to start her on donepezil (the drug for Alzheimers). For everything else you pretty much have to get things organised yourself, although we can make suggestions and point you in the right direction.
As Kareokepete says, many people who have been diagnosed with dementia start off with a diagnosis of Mild Cognitive Impairment (MCI) and nearly half of those diagnosed with MCI develop actual dementia within a year. I would phone the memory clinic, explain the problem (they will have heard it many times before) and see if you can get another appointment, although you may have to go back to her GP for re-referral.
When you go for the appointment, dont refer to it as the Memory Clinic if this will cause problems, or you might like to say its an appointment to prove the doctor wrong and she that she is perfectly OK. You often have to resort to stealth to get them to appointments as they have lost their reasoning. I remember reading on her that one person said to their mum that she was going out for tea and cake and just called in to the clinic on their way............
If it is confirmed as Alzheimers then there is medication to slow down the progress, although if it is any other type of dementia, Im afraid that there is nothing for the dementia as such although there are drugs for various symptoms like anxiety, aggression and paranoia if this ever becomes a problem. Dont expect too much from the Memory Clinic, though - my mum only went to the Memory Clinic in order to get a diagnosis and to start her on donepezil (the drug for Alzheimers). For everything else you pretty much have to get things organised yourself, although we can make suggestions and point you in the right direction.
