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Medically retired

Jake's Nan

New member
Aug 12, 2021
7
0
Hello, my brother, age 58, has recently received a diagnosis of Alzheimers and after a review meeting it was agreed he should be medically retired from his work. I contacted social services on advice of his consultant and a Community Agent phoned him and gave him a number to ring if needed. He lives alone and now his work has ended will have no social interaction apart from popping to the shops daily. No family live that near, nearest is approx 50 miles away. He is ok at the moment but any help I could look into for him? Most clubs seem to be for older people and not sure if he would be interested. Eventually we may see if he would move nearer a family member. Thanks
 

Izzy

Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
65,260
0
70
Dundee
Welcome to the forum @Jake’s Nan. I’m so sorry to read about your brother’s diagnosis. Such a young age to be facing this.

You might be able to find some support through the link on this page -


I also wondered if this factsheet would be of any interest to you -

 

Chaplin

Registered User
May 24, 2015
140
0
Bristol
Hello, my brother, age 58, has recently received a diagnosis of Alzheimers and after a review meeting it was agreed he should be medically retired from his work. I contacted social services on advice of his consultant and a Community Agent phoned him and gave him a number to ring if needed. He lives alone and now his work has ended will have no social interaction apart from popping to the shops daily. No family live that near, nearest is approx 50 miles away. He is ok at the moment but any help I could look into for him? Most clubs seem to be for older people and not sure if he would be interested. Eventually we may see if he would move nearer a family member. Thanks
If your brother is still physically fit but needs help with planning and organising he may be able to do some voluntary work or charity work. If he has some particular interests there may be local clubs who could support him. Hope the links from Izzy gives some options.
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
6,217
0
Southampton
my husband goes to mens shed which is national now so wonder if theres any around locally to you. its for men of all ages and dementia or not. he goes twice a week at the moment and enjoys the company of other men where there is not age limits. they have benches, power tools and other tools. you can do something or just have a cup of tea and chat or play cards or whatever interests them. my husband has vascular dementia for about 2 1/2 yrs and he is treated the same as everyone else. he feels valued
 

Jake's Nan

New member
Aug 12, 2021
7
0
If your brother is still physically fit but needs help with planning and organising he may be able to do some voluntary work or charity work. If he has some particular interests there may be local clubs who could support him. Hope the links from Izzy gives some options.
Thank you, yes at the moment he is very fit, he has had to surrender his driving licence so transport may be an issue but we will start checking things out.
 

Jake's Nan

New member
Aug 12, 2021
7
0
my husband goes to mens shed which is national now so wonder if theres any around locally to you. its for men of all ages and dementia or not. he goes twice a week at the moment and enjoys the company of other men where there is not age limits. they have benches, power tools and other tools. you can do something or just have a cup of tea and chat or play cards or whatever interests them. my husband has vascular dementia for about 2 1/2 yrs and he is treated the same as everyone else. he feels valued
Thank you yes I have heard of the mens shed, I really enjoy the TV show Repair Shop so clever what people can do. Will start to check few things out.
 

Sarasa

Volunteer Host
Apr 13, 2018
3,666
0
I was going to suggest a spot of volunteering, maybe a charity shop. I volunteer in one, and we have a wide range of people there, and a variety of tasks that need doing. Also places like local stately homes might have a scheme or two. I visited a couple of months ago that had a weekly gardening club for a range of people. Their raised beds were lovely. but they also had a lot of time for tea, cake and chat.
 

silkiest

Registered User
Feb 9, 2017
373
0
Hi @Jake's Nan , If you think that long term a move nearer the family will be useful I would suggest you discuss this with him now. He will hopefully have more insight now and should adjust to a move easier in the early stages and would cope better with a move physically now. He hopefully will also be able to take part in discussions about what is suitable and what his long term needs may be.
By the time SIL thought we should move MIL to a smaller place it was very obvious that she would not be able to find her way around a new home or area so she has had to stay put. You also need to think about how much you or other family members are able to help. Moving house is a big thing - SIL expected us to sort it out as she lives in USA, but by then I knew that I was not willing to take on the stress of selling MIL's house , finding a suitable new house for her and organising the physical move all whilst also looking after her.
Please talk to your brother about Power of Attorney if you have not yet - if you wait until they are needed it may be too late. You need both the health and finance ones. You can do them online through the gov.uk website and they should be registered straight away so his attorneys can act under his instructions as things start to get more difficult for him. Think about who is best to be attorneys - if all the attorneys are older than him they may find the responsibilities too much as they get older.
In the early days MIL still knew what needed doing but could not cope with all the options when phoning utilities etc. When we got POA it was so much easier - I could carry out her requests without having to be physically present in her house (without it she had to give permission each time over the phone for me to act on her behalf).
 

Jake's Nan

New member
Aug 12, 2021
7
0
Hi @Jake's Nan , If you think that long term a move nearer the family will be useful I would suggest you discuss this with him now. He will hopefully have more insight now and should adjust to a move easier in the early stages and would cope better with a move physically now. He hopefully will also be able to take part in discussions about what is suitable and what his long term needs may be.
By the time SIL thought we should move MIL to a smaller place it was very obvious that she would not be able to find her way around a new home or area so she has had to stay put. You also need to think about how much you or other family members are able to help. Moving house is a big thing - SIL expected us to sort it out as she lives in USA, but by then I knew that I was not willing to take on the stress of selling MIL's house , finding a suitable new house for her and organising the physical move all whilst also looking after her.
Please talk to your brother about Power of Attorney if you have not yet - if you wait until they are needed it may be too late. You need both the health and finance ones. You can do them online through the gov.uk website and they should be registered straight away so his attorneys can act under his instructions as things start to get more difficult for him. Think about who is best to be attorneys - if all the attorneys are older than him they may find the responsibilities too much as they get older.
In the early days MIL still knew what needed doing but could not cope with all the options when phoning utilities etc. When we got POA it was so much easier - I could carry out her requests without having to be physically present in her house (without it she had to give permission each time over the phone for me to act on her behalf).
 

Jake's Nan

New member
Aug 12, 2021
7
0
Thank you for such helpful info. He private rents so at least no selling of property needed etc. We will definitely look into POA asap. It's all the unknown, he hopefully may stay well and independent for ages we just don't know. I would love him to be nearer to me but I can retire in 4 years and my husband has said maybe we could downsize and move to cheaper area so may feel pressure to stay put! Lots to think about.