Hi there
I am looking for urgent advice if at all possible. I don’t know what to do for the best.
my mum has vascular dementia. At home she was very lonely and we just couldn’t meet her emotional needs. The pandemic made this 100 times worse ? she begged us every day to find her somewhere new to live with company. We put it off for as long as possible because of the coronavirus cases in care homes. However, in July we found a placement for her. On the day, however, she became very distressed and had to be sectioned and taken to hospital. She was shouting and swearing and hit my sister and I - she didn’t hit anyone else, but slapped our hands. She spent time in hospital, just to stabilise her after the experience. She was discharged to a care home but didn’t settle. Every day was a bit of a battle. Mainly asking when she could go home, shouting and swearing, taking everything out of her room, trying to influence other people too. At that time mums hospital social worker was not sure a care home was required long term which meant we didn’t know what was happening and couldn’t have discussions with mum. The care home asked for her to be readmitted to hospital where she stayed for 3 months. This time she has a psychological assessment using the Newcastle Model, her meds reviewed by psychiatry, an OT assessment and the social worker completed his assessment too. All were in agreement about longer term nursing care. Mum was fairly settled in hospital after the first week or so.
My mum has been in her new care home for 10 days time and today they have said that she cannot stay and needs to be moved tomorrow. On day 4 they wanted her to leave despite being fully prepared for her to be unsettled. She is currently the only resident there due to it being a new home, therefore there are 3 staff members on at every shift who can support my mum. We have many concerns about how the situation has been managed and some concerns over the care mum has had and some of this is now being investigated. The view of mums team is that she is safe and her needs are being met by the home - yet they say her behaviours are too difficult to manage. She shouts, swears and throws everything when she is distressed. As the week has progressed this behaviour has improved as we hoped it would and she has had more settled periods, which again, we thought she would. But the home have said today that more residents are coming in and they cannot have mum there any longer as they have to think of the bigger picture. We were desperate for this to work because it’s in mums home town and the area is very familiar to her.
However we have a situation where mum has to move tomorrow - back to hospital probably, yet she does not need hospital care. She has had all of the assessments she needs to get. We feel she needs somewhere that will commit to supporting her through the transition period.
We are in Scotland and hoped other people could offer advice?
in desperation earlier I emailed mums clinical team and asked their view on her returning home with care but in my heart I know this isn’t really the best option. But I can’t bear for her to return to hospital as it was the pits. It was awful and the thought of more time there makes devastates me.
no
I am looking for urgent advice if at all possible. I don’t know what to do for the best.
my mum has vascular dementia. At home she was very lonely and we just couldn’t meet her emotional needs. The pandemic made this 100 times worse ? she begged us every day to find her somewhere new to live with company. We put it off for as long as possible because of the coronavirus cases in care homes. However, in July we found a placement for her. On the day, however, she became very distressed and had to be sectioned and taken to hospital. She was shouting and swearing and hit my sister and I - she didn’t hit anyone else, but slapped our hands. She spent time in hospital, just to stabilise her after the experience. She was discharged to a care home but didn’t settle. Every day was a bit of a battle. Mainly asking when she could go home, shouting and swearing, taking everything out of her room, trying to influence other people too. At that time mums hospital social worker was not sure a care home was required long term which meant we didn’t know what was happening and couldn’t have discussions with mum. The care home asked for her to be readmitted to hospital where she stayed for 3 months. This time she has a psychological assessment using the Newcastle Model, her meds reviewed by psychiatry, an OT assessment and the social worker completed his assessment too. All were in agreement about longer term nursing care. Mum was fairly settled in hospital after the first week or so.
My mum has been in her new care home for 10 days time and today they have said that she cannot stay and needs to be moved tomorrow. On day 4 they wanted her to leave despite being fully prepared for her to be unsettled. She is currently the only resident there due to it being a new home, therefore there are 3 staff members on at every shift who can support my mum. We have many concerns about how the situation has been managed and some concerns over the care mum has had and some of this is now being investigated. The view of mums team is that she is safe and her needs are being met by the home - yet they say her behaviours are too difficult to manage. She shouts, swears and throws everything when she is distressed. As the week has progressed this behaviour has improved as we hoped it would and she has had more settled periods, which again, we thought she would. But the home have said today that more residents are coming in and they cannot have mum there any longer as they have to think of the bigger picture. We were desperate for this to work because it’s in mums home town and the area is very familiar to her.
However we have a situation where mum has to move tomorrow - back to hospital probably, yet she does not need hospital care. She has had all of the assessments she needs to get. We feel she needs somewhere that will commit to supporting her through the transition period.
We are in Scotland and hoped other people could offer advice?
in desperation earlier I emailed mums clinical team and asked their view on her returning home with care but in my heart I know this isn’t really the best option. But I can’t bear for her to return to hospital as it was the pits. It was awful and the thought of more time there makes devastates me.
no
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