Mam in Care Home


Registered User
Jan 15, 2008
Mam went into care home yesterday. I was fine until the point when she put her coat on and said she would take a look round as it would be the last time she'd see the place. Well I just folded. I went into the bathroom as I didn't want her to see me so upset. She had a sad look but shed no tears so I knew I had to pull myself together and not let her see me falling apart.

The move went well and I went to see her today and she was so pleased to see me it was as though she hadn't seen me for months rather than just yesterday. For a moment I thought she was going to say I hate it I want to come home, but no, she seemed quite cheery and chatty - talking a bit of nonsense but that doesn't matter. I was so relieved to see her so happy. I just hope it stays that way, but I know from reading TP that it can be a honeymoon period and she may have bad days but I'm expecting those.

Fingers crossed I've found a home that she'll be really happy in and well cared for. So far I've found all the staff to be really friendly and caring. They gave her a Welcome to your new home card which I thought was a lovely touch.

She's on the EMI floor which I was a bit unsure of at first but having seen her today I'm quite happy as there are more staff up there and there are lots of things on the wall for them to touch and look at.

Now I've just got to face the nightmare of sorting all the financial details out but I'll give myself a few weeks to draw breath before I make a start.


Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
Hello Roma

What a relief it must have been for you to find your mother cheerful when you went to visit.
You have done well in finding just the right home for her.
Love xx

fearful fiona

Registered User
Apr 19, 2007
Dear Roma,

What a relief to find somewhere nice, I know how you feel because I feel that my Mum too is in the right place too. However like you it is early days, but let's hope both our Mums settle in well.


Registered User
Mar 7, 2004
Dear Roma,
She's on the EMI floor
Don't be alarmed about that. The home Lionel is in, and one he stayed at before for respite, have two halves. One purely elderly frail residental, and the other side EMI.

The activities and and staffing levels are both so much greater on the EMI side. Indeed, often we get 'visits' from some of the residents in the other wing. The atmosphere seems so much livelier somehow, although of course, not without the odd incident.;)


Registered User
Feb 21, 2008
my mother too went into a care home recently

I understand just how you feel Roma - I have struggled over the past month and hope I am now beginning to come to terms with the change for us all. Mam seems to be coping better than I expected but then she does notice the more severely confused residents and comments on their behaviour. It is only when she then comes out with something bizarre and as with the other day forgot her late husband's( my dad's ) name that I realised how ill she is getting. We have to believe in ourselves and see the benefit of the home. Like yours mam is in a friendly warm environment and I am sure we will find strength in accepting this change in time.

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