It was his birthday yesterday and our children have had it planned for ages - corona permitting - a trip to the coast while it was quiet followed by a bbq at our daughter's. Everything went fine, lovely afternoon. I must say he did not appear to register my presence particularly (and did not notice when I quietly slipped away later). Would look at him and think he as speaking normally mixed in with not normal and thought, as I have often, should be really be in a care home? Thought he may get agitated when he was taken back and indeed he did say he was not going back into that lockdown place but went in calmly enough and started talking to whoever was there. An hour later care home rang elder daughter, who had arranged all this, to say he was angry, agitated, try to throw a table through the window, yanking door handle off in the kitchen, very aggressive. My eldest daughter, who sees herself as the likely trigger - she lives in London, is here for a week and visited him every day - did not go as requested to calm him, second daughter did. She was there three hours. He would not take his medication or go to bed and - in a throwback to the weekend that sparked his move to a care home, talked about someone hurting his mother. All in all, it all ended badly. We cannot risk him possibly harming the staff, he is a man, strong,still relatively young (68 yesterday). The idea that he could come out Christmas Day is not going to happen. All three of my children are very upset at how it all turned out. Only second daughter who lives in town and went through it all with me had an inkling how he could be - though he has never been so violent to throw a table at a window. This is a long post, I just wanted to tell someone.