My dear Mum died recently too, on Remembrance Sunday. She had been diagnosed with Alzheimers three years previously, but there had been signs that something was not quite right. My Dad had been worried about her for some time, but when he died she was completely lost. Not only losing her husband of 40 years, but also the person who knew what day and time it was and who would help her sort things out. I knew something was wrong when she couldn't spell properly anymore. she had always been brilliant at spelling. One of the last things that my Dad said to me before he died was "look after your Mum". When Mum was diagnosed with Alzheimers I promised I'd stick with her no matter what. That has been very difficult. I am a Christian and for me that would not have been possible without God. And very good friends and family. I know that others have other means of support. I hope that everyone gets the sort of support that they need. Mum had been declining for sometime, but when the staff at the care home said that they felt we needed to talk with the doctor and perhaps the end was getting near that I entered a sort of strange limbo land. Mum was with me but wouldn't be for much longer. How do you deal with an absence to come when that person is still very much a presence? I was fortunate. Mum knew me up to the point where she was so ill she was really not interacting any more. Just a week before she died she saw me and put her arms out to me to hug me. I was fortunate that I was there when she took her last breaths, with her eyes open, looking into my face. I held her hand, stroked her head and told her it was all alright. I only had the week after she died off and then went back to work. I didn't have a reason not to. dealing with the sympathy of my colleagues is difficult, but I know they are trying to help and be a comfort. I just feel lost. I was blessed to spend time with her everyday before she died, and was with her all night before she died at 6am. I thought I saw her last weekend, as she had been. I haven't cried very much. I am not sure if it has really sunk in.