My Brave and precious Mother is gently slipping away from us and I just can't imagine the world without her in it. Her name is Silvia, 82 years old and about 7 years with Alzheimers. We still have her at home and she's going nowhere. We have a team of 7 carers, mostly family, a care team that comes in 3 times a day, the relief when they came was so enormous its beyond explanation. The financial cost is staggering but its only money. She is safe, warm and surrounded by love and she deserves no less. No care homes and hospitals for Silvia, she would not want it because I know her so well. Now we are lucky to be able to be with her and look into her face and reassure her and tell her how loved she is. Its priceless and its been the most traumatic 6 years, but its also a privilege and I have not a single regret. My heart is breaking and I can't stop the tears, I dont care if I cry in The Co-op or the local shop, I cry in the car, in the bath and into my pillow at night. My Father died when I was 3 so Mum is all we had, no family just Silvia and her 4 kids, I'm 54 now so is it normal to feel like Im going to be an orphan? Sorry to be so sad but I am sad, I know it will get easier but right now its so sad.
looks like the end of mums journey is gently coming into view.
- Thread starter mrs pepperpot
- Start date
Heartbreak
Hello pepperpot, oh dear, I can so feel your heartbreak....We would all,in an ideal world, want to be looked after and surrounded by so much love, you and your family could not do anymore for your lovely mum, Silvia...Your mum will feel all this love and care from you all, its a wonderful way to repay her, as I can imagine life was hard for her on her own with 4 little ones..But look at you all now, holding her hand, surrounding her with love..Its very touching...I am also 54 and i live with my mum and care for her, and she is now my world, but I have the heartbreak to come....Your lovely mum has brought up a good family...Am thinking of you at this sad time, bless you all xxx
Hello pepperpot, oh dear, I can so feel your heartbreak....We would all,in an ideal world, want to be looked after and surrounded by so much love, you and your family could not do anymore for your lovely mum, Silvia...Your mum will feel all this love and care from you all, its a wonderful way to repay her, as I can imagine life was hard for her on her own with 4 little ones..But look at you all now, holding her hand, surrounding her with love..Its very touching...I am also 54 and i live with my mum and care for her, and she is now my world, but I have the heartbreak to come....Your lovely mum has brought up a good family...Am thinking of you at this sad time, bless you all xxx
I am so sorry you are going through such a sad time.
Feeling like an orphan..... Yes I totally felt like that when my Mum died, it's really funny, I have a lovely husband had been married for over 20 years at the time, and yet I felt so very alone, as if I had nobody that would always love and be there for me without question.... Unconditionally. I guess the bond is so strong, for me it was.
Feeling like an orphan..... Yes I totally felt like that when my Mum died, it's really funny, I have a lovely husband had been married for over 20 years at the time, and yet I felt so very alone, as if I had nobody that would always love and be there for me without question.... Unconditionally. I guess the bond is so strong, for me it was.
Darling Silvia.
She did a good job with her family and you are paying her back in kind.
It's a dreadfully hard thing to do, I did it for my Mam too...little Mary.
I would not take back a moment of the times I spent with her when she was in her hours of need, they are THE most precious times.
I am 54 too. Today is the 24th anniversary of my Dad's death...no...you're not weird to think you're an orphan. It's strange to have both of your parents missing and not a catastrophic as it would be if you were a bairn but when it's new to you (my Mam died this February) it can still sting a tiny bit.
The important thing is your Mum is here for now, you are supporting her during her struggle out of life, probably as great a struggle as the one she had to give birth to you.
Full circle.
Love.
I hope love gives you strength and courage, peace and stamina.
Best wishes to your little Mum, you and all who love her. xx
She did a good job with her family and you are paying her back in kind.
It's a dreadfully hard thing to do, I did it for my Mam too...little Mary.
I would not take back a moment of the times I spent with her when she was in her hours of need, they are THE most precious times.
I am 54 too. Today is the 24th anniversary of my Dad's death...no...you're not weird to think you're an orphan. It's strange to have both of your parents missing and not a catastrophic as it would be if you were a bairn but when it's new to you (my Mam died this February) it can still sting a tiny bit.
The important thing is your Mum is here for now, you are supporting her during her struggle out of life, probably as great a struggle as the one she had to give birth to you.
Full circle.
Love.
I hope love gives you strength and courage, peace and stamina.
Best wishes to your little Mum, you and all who love her. xx
I know exactly what you mean, when I was losing my mum to cancer I cried so much but had to put a brave face on as I ran a bnb so at times was extremely difficult to have a smiling face. I was with mum at the end and im glad I was, so knowing how much you care for her I'm sure you too will be with her. It is a sad time but being there somehow made it less traumatic and would say to anyone if you can be there.
Care homes aren't all bad, some look after their 'guests' really well, there is nothing wrong with having to place a family member in one, sometimes needs must and again you are lucky having great family support.
My thoughts are with you and anyone else at this sad time.
Care homes aren't all bad, some look after their 'guests' really well, there is nothing wrong with having to place a family member in one, sometimes needs must and again you are lucky having great family support.
My thoughts are with you and anyone else at this sad time.
Thank you so much for the kind words, they are like a soothing balm to my hurting, I know that when you say things you actually do know how it feels and I am glad you can still be kind, when all is said and done, there is only kindness. Thank you.
