1. marmarlade

    marmarlade Registered User

    Jan 26, 2015
    183
    my husband has gone into care after looking after him for 5 years i am lost the house is so lonely and the days so long.i go to see him every two to three days ,but all he says is i want to come home and see our dogs,he doesnt stay and talk to me just wanders around and get frustrated the things he says really hurt i know he dosent mean them ,but he keeps saying i dont like him any more thats why he,s there i,m going again today and hoping things will be a bit better
     
  2. marionq

    marionq Registered User

    Apr 24, 2013
    5,902
    Female
    Scotland
    I don't know what age you are but there is life out there at any age beyond the reaches of dementia. You probably are ground down from years of caring but you owe it to yourself to make the most of what years are left to you. Perhaps if you could tell TP a little more about yourself - age, area, if you have friends or family then members can come up with some advice.

    Good luck.
     
  3. marmarlade

    marmarlade Registered User

    Jan 26, 2015
    183
    thank you for your reply i am new at this i am 70 but a young 70 i have few good friends and a very good family dont know what i would have done without my son and daughter but this going into care hits everyone hard. we have been married for 51 years so it takes some getting used to .to be by yourself i have our dogs for company and dont know what i would do without the crazy welcome i get from them ,we can take the dogs in to see my husband ,but at the moment he,s not settled enough but its so nice to know someone else feels like you do will keep you posted how this visit goes
     
  4. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,815
    UK
    Keep posting Marmarlade, especially when feeling lonely, it will help. I sometimes suffer the complete opposite to you. After an independent life as a single person I now have my mum living with me who was diagnosed with Vascular Dementia a year ago. Occasionally I long for my old life.
     
  5. jaymor

    jaymor Volunteer Moderator

    Jul 14, 2006
    12,558
    Female
    England
    My husband entered care two and a half years ago following me being his sole carer for 7 years. I will be 70 this year and like you blessed with good friends and family.

    I visit my husband daily but now have a good social life with the friends who knew me before, through and now after dementia care. My husband is settled so that takes so much worry away. Hopefully it won't be too long before your husband settles and you can make plans to do what you would like to do.

    I know when my husband first went into caree I sat and made plans, things to do, places to go, it was something to look forward to, took a while to be ready to do it but I got there. I suppose I am lucky in the fact I don't mind my own company so being on my own is not a problem. Bring lonely would be a big problem but I have my friends and family and also my wonderful supportive dementia friends too.

    Give yourself time and how wonderful to have two lovely dogs to come home to.

    Take care,

    Jay
     

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