hi anne-marie
and nita
dad moved into his care home a couple of years ago now, and I had given up work to help care for him at home before that
it took me some time to settle myself after his move; I was looking after his house for a while, as we didn't live together, and I found the daily walks over to his house (to open curtains in the morning, titivate, and close curtains at night) really helped as I got some exercise and some fresh air, and it top-and-tailed my day - so maybe a short circular walk morning and evening might help
I also gradually began to sort out my own house, as I'd been keeping dad's neat and tidy at the expense of my own - and got myself out into my garden to slowly sort it out (very slowly - still a lot to do; but the garden will stay there so there's no need to rush or put myself under pressure)
I did take on some voluntary work, not anything to do with caring (I could do anything for my own dad but I'm just not a people person enough to help care for someone else) - I took it on for precisely the opposite reason you mention - I felt that as it was voluntary, I was more in control and could miss a session if I had to (giving notice, of course) - so I collected for Marie Curie which is just a few hours maybe 4-5 times a year - and I went to my family history society once a week to help for one session = something I enjoy and a lovely safe way to meet a small group of people in a comfortable environment (it would also be a good way to re-skill as the tasks I undertake are those someone in work needs) - I also deliberately contacted a couple of family members and friends I hadn't seen much of and arranged to see them, maybe only once a month, but it got me out and about, and reconnected
that gave me the confidence and impetus to take some short breaks on my own - I hadn't had a holiday without dad for years - I've loved revisiting some childhood haunts, just for a few days, in an inexpensive B&B
I started small, because I know I'm not good at having to do something everyday - 2 years later my life is still pretty quiet but very much changed - and I visit dad 3-4 times a week so he's not at all forgotten
best wishes