Hi, I've just joined TP and the Alzheimers forum. My Dad has just died of the disease at the age of 97, after suffering from it for about 6 years. I wish I had found this forum while he was going through it all. He was in a lovely nursing home for the last three years of his life, and my sister and I sat with him right to the end. We wanted to be there for him, holding his hand and talking to him until he died. A couple of hours before he passed away, he was still able to talk a little, and his last words were 'I was always so very fund of your Mum'. He was the most lovely man, and his death has not come as a relief, as I thought it would. Instead, I still feel in shock after the difficult last few hours and being with him when he died, the first time I had ever witnessed a death. Now, I just feel that I miss him, and wish that I had been able to do more to help him in this horrid disease.
What concerns me most is that people expect me to feel relief and to be fine. It does not seem acceptable in our society to feel real grief for very old people who die. I am staying positive, understand that it really is a relief for him to be out of his confusion and distress, and that I need to move on. But I have been surprised by how difficult it all is!
What concerns me most is that people expect me to feel relief and to be fine. It does not seem acceptable in our society to feel real grief for very old people who die. I am staying positive, understand that it really is a relief for him to be out of his confusion and distress, and that I need to move on. But I have been surprised by how difficult it all is!
