Lack of information

J53

Registered User
Oct 9, 2018
46
My Dad died last Monday in his care home, that's all I know! Due to a family rift My mother and youngest brother will no longer speak to me, ( even though it was through me trying to get my mum to understand about my father choking as they were hitting a brick wall with her). My youngest brother called me 5 hours after my father passed even though he was there with my mother ( breaking the covid 19 rules) I find myself a week on i still don't know the funeral home where he is. All I know he is not with the coroner the care ho e refuse to tell me where my father was sent after he died as they have no paperwork!!!!!!!!! All I want to know is where my father is as his Grandchildren and I would like to send something to be placed in his coffin before he is cremated! We don't live close so we want to keep ourselves safe.
Any ideas what I can do as I think he will be cremated before I know anything
 

Izzy

Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
61,856
69
Dundee
I’m so sorry for your loss @J53 and for the situation you find yourself in.

Will there be an announcement in the local newspaper? It’s just a longshot but sometimes a funeral home is mentioned in these. The announcements for our local newspaper can be read online.

Sending my condolences and wishing you strength,
 

J53

Registered User
Oct 9, 2018
46
I’m so sorry about your dad @J53. I can only suggest ringing around the funeral homes.
Thankyou I did start but I have been warned by one that if my mother has a privacy order I wont be told anything
 

J53

Registered User
Oct 9, 2018
46
I’m so sorry for your loss @J53 and for the situation you find yourself in.

Will there be an announcement in the local newspaper? It’s just a longshot but sometimes a funeral home is mentioned in these. The announcements for our local newspaper can be read online.

Sending my condolences and wishing you strength,
Thankyou I am hoping I can read the public list at the crematorium near where he lived x
 

Louise7

Registered User
Mar 25, 2016
2,047
Sorry to hear about your dad and your family situation which must be really hard for you. I think the problem will be that as your mother is next of kin the funeral home or crematorium will not let you put something in the coffin without asking her permission first. As your brother was in touch to inform you about the death could you send him a text and explain that you'd like to put something in the coffin, or have you already tried that? Sorry, but I can't think of what else you could do if your mother doesn't want to provide information to you.