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Keep taking Mum with memory problems to doctor but ignored


Registered User
Feb 20, 2015
Every time I take my 90 year old Mum to the doctor and tell them about her bad memory they just ignore me. Everyone says what do you expect at her age. I notice that memory problems are noted on her notes. Now she doesn't want to go as she says she doesn't want to know. I took her to another doctor who asked who the Prime Minister was during the war and other questions that she knew straight away but she keeps asking me things that we were talking about just a few minutes previous.
I lost my Dad a few years ago and Mum is still living at her home alone but its becoming harder, emotionally, stress and it upsets me everytime I go to see her. I had a heart attack last year and my husband walked out two years ago and I am trying to look after two dependent children. Its all got too much and I keep having anxiety attacks, another one today, during last night, I am exhausted. I don't get any benefits or support, I just don't know what to do next. My Mum is okay at home at the moment but I have to put her supplements up and BP pills and do her shopping. I try and take her out in the car at least a few times a week and she is still capable of eating out and walking around although she holds my hand now.
I thought there was good support available but I haven't seen any despite asking!! Its just so so sad, it is breaking my heart and I am so worried. This is the first time on this website, just found it. Does anyone know of any supplements that help, she has had no tests for vitamins or minerals, I wonder if its a deficiency. Otherwise she is in good shape.


Registered User
Sep 27, 2006
You don't need a diagnosis of dementia to get some help for your mother. If she/you have some funding you can pay for extra help if that is what she needs. If there isn't the funds for this you can apply to social services to make an assessment of her needs and depending on her income they will contribute to the costs if they feel she is getting too frail to manage without some help.

Not all forgetfulness is caused by dementia. I'm not nearly your mother's age and I am very forgetful.