Just when you think you have it under control and have come to terms with this disease and the situation you find yourself in, boy can it come back and bite you. My husband has been in care for three and a half years, he is in a nice home and is very settled. Although he seems to know me and smiles when I go in every day he seldom speaks. Today we were sitting in his room together as usual when he pointed to the soft toy dog on his bed, we call him 'hug me' because he has a little jumper on with that on the front. When I gave it to him he stroked its head and then kissed it so gently and just cuddled it. Since then I just cannot control the tears, I just want him to come home, I want our life back but most of all I hate this illness with all my heart and the pain it causes is unimaginable.