I am crying my eyes out as I write this , as I do every time I read other people's experiences on this forum and realise they are the same as mine. I cry a lot recently as I am coming to the conclusion that my wife's deteriorating behaviour ( sooo argumentative with irrational obsessions together with poor memory are symptoms of the impending dementia. I managed to get her to the gp under guise of regular check I and she has a ct scan next week. I find it all so frustrating. Kev
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- Thread starter Kevmate
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Hello, Kev. I've spent years crying over people's experiences whilst looking after my Mum. ~The CT scan may help with a diagnosis, but it's you who will help your wife, and people on this forum who will help you. We all understand your frustration and your grief, and there will be lots of sympathy and hugs and practical advice if you need it. Keep yourself well, and keep posting x
Kev it helps if you are meeting other people. In the early stages we went to every Alz group I could find. Singing, Walking, football memories. Allotments.
It is really important to mix with others and share your experience. If you can get your wife into daycare for a day it will give her company and entertainment and give you a breathing space. Look at what your LA is offering.
It is really important to mix with others and share your experience. If you can get your wife into daycare for a day it will give her company and entertainment and give you a breathing space. Look at what your LA is offering.
Welcome to the forums Kev. You are not alone here, I've been crying or close to it a few times since my partners' diagnosis. Many people have written about anticipatory grief as you watch someone you love deteriorating, and you may want to think about counselling as that helped me.
Getting the CT scan is a good step, and hopefully the result will let you know what is happening to your wife.
Getting a carers assessment and a care needs assessment from you local authority will help you access some of the facilities and support Marion mentioned. Typing your postcode into the search box at https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/find-support-near-you will give you an idea what is available. Good luck and keep in touch.
Thanks for your replies. My oh is still able to function well , shopping, driving etc although I notice more things are shifting to me . Whilst my wife enjoys talking to EVERYONE and telling them all the same script ( part of her behaviour change). I find it incredibly annoying.. I know I shouldn't but I do. No one else had noticed her deterioration until I pointed out to my stepdaughter a coople of months ago. I feel alone although I'm not a "joining in" person .. yet.
It's the constant arguing I hate, I try to bite my tongue and not react to ridiculous statements / behaviour but find it hard at times . Sorry to go on but I feel I have years worth to unburden
Kev
It's the constant arguing I hate, I try to bite my tongue and not react to ridiculous statements / behaviour but find it hard at times . Sorry to go on but I feel I have years worth to unburden
Kev
Just go on, Kev. It will help you a bit, I hope. I well remember the frustration. For me, one of the things was my mother constantly asking "Where's my car?" in a very suspicious way. Every day. For months. She didn't even live with me and that question drove me mad. I learned to give answers that would satisfy her but it still made me crazy. Finally it started petering out and stopped. Except for 6 months later when it showed up again for a last time. I nearly tore my hair out when I heard that question again.
Hi kev and welcome to TP sending big (((hugs))) to you.,We are all on this long heartbreaking journey I've cried on and off more recently on for two years at what ad has done to my mum, councilling helped me a bit but doesn't take the pain away of this horrundeous illness x
