It's what your PARENT....

worriedson1

Registered User
Jan 30, 2012
1,837
0
Who has dementia says MATTERS AND ONLY THEM THAT MATTERS THAT SAY IT.

IF YOUR PARENT SAYS TO YOU/ANSWERS YOU AND SAYS YOU ARE DOING A GOOD JOB CARING FOR THEM. WHAT THEY SAY IS WHAT COUNTS NUMERO UNO.

WHAT ANYONE ELSE SAYS ABOUT YOUAS A CARER SIMPLY DOES NOT MATTER AT ALL.
 

Jessbow

Registered User
Mar 1, 2013
5,677
0
Midlands
I guess it depends.

Most with dementia are not capable of making judgements , so their view , stand alone, is probably not taken into consideration .

We need to bear in mind these are the same parents who judge that its a good idea to go down the villiage at 2am in their Jimjams
 

Fed Up

Registered User
Aug 4, 2012
464
0
As I was a carer for years I'd say it matters to a lot of people a lot.
WE are judged by the SS the GP's and experts and rightly so to protect those who are unable to look after themselves. We sometimes make decisions that must be judged as being in the best interests of the cared for. That may not be what the cared for want so whilst I'd always try to persuade my mum in a few instances I have overruled her because it was in her best interest both physically and financially.
 

worriedson1

Registered User
Jan 30, 2012
1,837
0
As I was a carer for years I'd say it matters to a lot of people a lot.
WE are judged by the SS the GP's and experts and rightly so to protect those who are unable to look after themselves. We sometimes make decisions that must be judged as being in the best interests of the cared for. That may not be what the cared for want so whilst I'd always try to persuade my mum in a few instances I have overruled her because it was in her best interest both physically and financially.

It's more a case i was meaning of that of uhh people that know you ie neighbours etc that snipe and pass cruel judgement of you as a carer not people in an OFFICIAL Capicity.
 

SallyPotter

Registered User
May 19, 2013
161
0
Gloucestershire
Hi Worried Son.
with people like that the only thing you can do is ignore them, people say things like that because of ignorance + stupidity.
Before my parents went into the home one of their neighbours 'suggested' that it was time or me to stop being 'selfish' (as in worrying about paying my own mortgage) and devote all my time to my parents. I myself at that time was being eating up with both guilt and loss.
They are lucky as they don't have to suffer the catastrophic effects that dementia has on lives but just view from a 'concerned' and neighborly way.............
Just ignore them, as long as you believe that what you are doing is right for you and yours then you are doing the right thing.
Take care x
 

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