Mum's funeral took place yesterday. It was a cloudy and grey day, but didn't actually rain on us at the cemetery. I went to see mum a final time in the chapel of rest in the morning. Six weeks after she died, and she still looked OK and not really 92 at all! I'm glad she was embalmed, the visits helped me a lot. They closed the coffin in front of me. I'm not sure why, but I'm glad I saw that too. We took a drive past the house where mum used to live and then back to the church for a very lovely, but emotional service. The priest read the eulogy I had written, no way could I have done that. The hotel did a great spread and it was a good few hours, catching up with people, as you do. I had asked a friend to take some photos at the wake and have some good memories of those who came to pay their respects to mum and support me on the day. The photo board I did of mum's life was a hit, everyone said it was a lovely tribute and they enjoyed looking at it during the wake. There were some beautiful floral tributes and we went back to the cemetery afterwards to see them all on the grave and take some more photos.
I've had a friend staying with me but I dropped her back at Heathrow today, so am on my own again. That's the hardest bit right now, not having mum's presence in the house. Really hard, but I know it will get better in time.
I feel 'easier' now that the funeral is over and mum is laid to rest with dad. No more worries about how things will go. It went extremely well, and it's over, done. It occurred to me this morning that today is the beginning of the rest of my life. I'm not sure how long it will take for the sadness of her loss to subside and for the joy of the realisation that I achieved what I set to do to take over, but hopefully this will come and when it does I be grateful, and very pleased that the dementia chapter is over, book closed.
I don't plan to leave TP for good, but I need to step away a bit now. I just want to say again how much this place has helped me over the past three years and I truly believe it saved my sanity many a time when I was truly desperate with what mum's illness put us through. Thank you all once again and very best wishes to you all.