My hubby is in hospital being assessed for a care home. I rang the ward yesterday after I found his denture and I was asked to take in two changes of day clothes, and jamas etc so I put the dentures in too. My friends kindly took the holdall into hospital for me- I couldn't face going there and not being able to see him.
But then the phone rang and the nurse said hubby is anxious today and she put him on the phone- it was lovely to hear his voice. The nurse said he has a phone by his bed and I can ring him whenever I want, and he has a card on which he has my home number so he can ring me.
I thought this was a blessing but now I am so concerned and upset- he has rung me five times now telling me he is in hospital and asking me to go and pick him up as he can't stay in hospital. I used @canary tactic and told him the car is in the garage being mended. He sounded so disappointed.
Oh this is so distressing as I know that my back is agony and I can't bring him home . I can't manage 24/7 to keep him safe.
The hospital social worker rang to say he is fit to discharge and told me to decide which care home I want him to go for up to 6 weeks into respite in. I hadn't realised it was up to me to research and I have been on the phone and internet all day- I'm exhausted. The top up fees are hefty- on average an additional £240pw to be paid by a third party- from my own savings or a via a deferred charge on our home- as his pensions will be swallowed up.
The social worker later rang me to try to get me to use the cheapest home, and avoid top up fees, but it's in another village a few miles away with no bus service so when I can no longer drive it's a problem. The local authority will fund respite but then it's up to me to arrange payment for the long term care.
The stress is getting me down and I am trying so hard to stick to the plan to ensure his future, and mine.
But then the phone rang and the nurse said hubby is anxious today and she put him on the phone- it was lovely to hear his voice. The nurse said he has a phone by his bed and I can ring him whenever I want, and he has a card on which he has my home number so he can ring me.
I thought this was a blessing but now I am so concerned and upset- he has rung me five times now telling me he is in hospital and asking me to go and pick him up as he can't stay in hospital. I used @canary tactic and told him the car is in the garage being mended. He sounded so disappointed.
Oh this is so distressing as I know that my back is agony and I can't bring him home . I can't manage 24/7 to keep him safe.
The hospital social worker rang to say he is fit to discharge and told me to decide which care home I want him to go for up to 6 weeks into respite in. I hadn't realised it was up to me to research and I have been on the phone and internet all day- I'm exhausted. The top up fees are hefty- on average an additional £240pw to be paid by a third party- from my own savings or a via a deferred charge on our home- as his pensions will be swallowed up.
The social worker later rang me to try to get me to use the cheapest home, and avoid top up fees, but it's in another village a few miles away with no bus service so when I can no longer drive it's a problem. The local authority will fund respite but then it's up to me to arrange payment for the long term care.
The stress is getting me down and I am trying so hard to stick to the plan to ensure his future, and mine.