It has been a long time

[chants]

Hi, it has been a long time since I came to this site. Mum is still in the care home, but has deteriorated badly, she is now doubly incontinent and has given me a new name, the name of a cousin who has not been seen for 20 years. She asks me if I know her daughter, which is me of course! She cannot remember many members of the family, but remembers my son, his name and the fact that he has qualified as a doctor recently, amazing. She cries a lot now, whereas not that long ago, she did a lot of laughing. I find this heartbreaking and leave visits often in tears. At least I know she is as safe as I can make her, is fed good food and is clean and dressed nicely each day. It is a terrible disease, if Mum could see herself, she would be so upset. I am so glad Dad didn't live to see this also, it would have broken his heart. It is still hard emotionally, but physically it is easier. How long can this go on? I feel some days that she seems to have regressed to the time when she was 17 and had her first marriage. Weird!

Anyway, thanks for reading this, it does help just to write things down. Chants.

 

[BeckyJan]

Hello Chants and welcome back to TP.

Thanks for updating us about your Mum but sad to hear about the deterioration. My husband is probably at a similar stage and I understand how heartbreaking it is.

I hope you keep in touch; keep posting.
Best wishes

 

[Izzy]

Hi Chants. I can understand how hard it is. My mum goes through spells of thinking I'm her cousin Annie - who would be over 100 if she was still alive. She tells me she has a daughter with my name and that she's a headteacher too. She won't believe that's me. other days she knows exactly who I am. It's a strange and awful disease. x

 

[sistermillicent]

Hi Chants,
How sad that your mum's deteriorated like this, and I am sure she would not have wanted to be like that.

I am equally sure that she would have been so pleased to have you care so much about her and to have taken such care to make sure she is well looked after.

Pippa x