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Issues round the loo


Registered User
Apr 10, 2007
Vancouver Island, Canada
Hi all

I've been away for about 5 weeks, traveling with Ron to see family and a bit of holidaying in Europe. In all, I am happy I did it but it really is stressful going out and about with someone who absolutely would be at a loss if we got separated. It is quite different when we're out and about round here where everything is familiar to both of us.

An unanticipated stress was that Ron doesn't have bladder and bowel control as he should - it's not that he's incontinent, but if he needs to go, he needs to go NOW - very much like a 3 year old, you know they need to get to the the loo within minutes of mentioning they need to go. It never used to be this way, so I have a horrible feeling it's the progression of the dementia. This makes for high stress situations in unfamiliar cities with luggage! To me, this is happening way earlier than I thought it would - I thought by the time there were bladder and bowel issues, the person would be quite far along in the disease. Do any of you have a similar experience? I suspect there's not really much advise but of course I'd appreciate any!


Registered User
Jun 6, 2007

Glad you had a good break.
No advice, sorry. But I have noticed that John's aim is no longer what it should be and there have been instances of wet underpants - have been trying to block the possibility of further deterioration out of my mind

Canadian Joanne

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 8, 2005
Toronto, Canada
What I used to do to get my mother to go to the toilet was to say I needed to go & did she want to come with me? This whenever I saw a toilet in sight.

A little more difficult for you when you're traveling Anne. I think it's the disease process and it's just a little slippage at first. No advice really - as far as these problems happening later on - not necessarily. We can only be a proactive as we can (I do hate that word - what would be a better one??).


Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
SW Scotland
Hi Annesharlie and Jackie

Sorry you're having this problem. I went through it with John, and it really is hard to deal with. Annesharlie, you're right, it early for these problems to start, John was OK for six years. I'm afraid it is the start of incontinence, and once it starts, progression is in some cases quite quick.

Jackie, I'd have a word with your GP and ask for a referral to the continence advisor. They's very helpful, and can come up with all sorts of strategies for coping.

Annesharlie, I'm afraid that's not very helpful for you, because I don't know what your system is, but I'd still have a word with your GP. It could be that it is simply a prostate problem, which could be corrected.

Good luck,