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Is this Psychosis?? What do I do?

HilsK

New member
Jan 24, 2020
9
I have been a Carer for my hubby who has vascular dementia for over 12 years. I look after him without family support and as we have moved recently without the support of friends. The few beautiful friends I have made are all Carers tied up in their own current nightmares. I personally am struggling medically. The utter unreasonable chaos of Covid has made that impossible. six cancelled appointments with consultants and now confronted by an 18 week waiting list. But leaving that there I had yesterday to deal with what I believe was another psychotic episode from my husband. He has had some before, one of which led him to a fall in which he was injured. Yesterday for some reason he believed that I had told him to go and cut an 8'conifer tree down that is growing on our rockery.

The rockery is on a steep slope and I have installed handrails around the paths it to protect him from falling. I caught him on his way to this tree with a saw in hand. Asked what he was doing he told be quite aggressively that I had told him twice to go and cut the tree down. If he had got onto the rockery, let alone to the tree he would have been badly injured. Humouring him, distracting him didn't work and ended up shouting at him to stop. All he kept saying was "You told me to. I asked you and you told me twice. I can hear your voice now." Eventually, I made him sit down but he kept repeating his story and saying he was going to do it. He is still adamant today that I told him to and I am lying.

I found this desperately upsetting and disturbing as he could have really harmed himself and me if I had tried to stop him. This blame thing is something he does, all the time but this really frightened me. I tried to get help this morning .. the GP's are busy .. the Memory Clinic is working from home .. (That's my access to his consultant.)

I feel like walking out. I have had more than enough.

Has anyone else experience of this sort of thing?? I need to know what's going on here.
 

Shedrech

Volunteer Moderator
Dec 15, 2012
9,310
Yorkshire
hello @HilsK
how frightening for you

your Local Authority Adult Services should have an emergency number on the LA's website, call it and give them all the info in your post
tell them your husband's actions make him a vulnerable adult at risk of harming himself and you, that they have the duty of care to ensure he receives the support he needs
and that you are ready to walk out as you have reached carer breakdown and your own ill health means you simply cannot provide thd level of support he now needs
say you fear this is becoming a safeguarding issue as he or you are likely to be hurt and end up in hospital

do the same to your GP ... making clear that this is a concern for your health and welfare as well as ypur husband's ...it may be some meds may help your husband settle

this may sound OTT but you you need support now

to talk with someone in real time do call the support line
and Admiral nurses are there to support carers
 

HilsK

New member
Jan 24, 2020
9
Thankyou Shedrech .. It always sounds ottp after any 'event' but it seems because its not happening real time for them they don't want to know. I have just phoned my GP again and they said phone tomorrow at 8 .. you know the drill . His SW says she'll phone the GP. This feels like a whole new level I feel really uncomfortable with. He's sleeping and I find myself trying to avoid him today. Thanks again x
 

imthedaughter

Registered User
Apr 3, 2019
507
It sounds like a delusion but a delusion about your lunch coming from Australia is one thing, something involving a saw is quite another! If he starts with the saw again I think you must call the emergency services, don't risk harm to either of you. Keep a phone on you at all times and follow @Shedrech's advice too. Take care x
 

canary

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
13,672
South coast
I would make sure that all power tools were safely locked up (with no access to a key for him), or disposed of. Power tools are obviously too dangerous for him now.