Is this normal?

[redjumper]

Hi

Mum has just spent 6 weeks in hospital after a fall. When I visited, she was often confused and was hallucinating frequently. I took the decision for mum to go into respite from the hospital (with a view to making the move permanent) as I can no longer cope with her at home.

She has been in the home now for 4 days and has settled really well but is talking of coming home soon which scares me. However, mentally, she has improved a huge amount and can now remember some things, tell the time and actually hold a conversation. This is the best she has been for over a year. I just wanted to ask, is this normal?? Has anyone else experienced this happening?

Thanks

 

[nicoise]

Hi

Mum has just spent 6 weeks in hospital after a fall. When I visited, she was often confused and was hallucinating frequently. I took the decision for mum to go into respite from the hospital (with a view to making the move permanent) as I can no longer cope with her at home.

She has been in the home now for 4 days and has settled really well but is talking of coming home soon which scares me. However, mentally, she has improved a huge amount and can now remember some things, tell the time and actually hold a conversation. This is the best she has been for over a year. I just wanted to ask, is this normal?? Has anyone else experienced this happening?

Thanks

Dear Redjumper,

I see from previous posts that you say your mum has Lewy Body dementia - it is possible that she is having a good phase at present, due to the fluctuating nature of this type of dementia.

She may also be benefiting from the 24/7 type of care she is getting in respite, and you are seeing the better side of her rather than taking all the brunt of her problems and moods as you were at home. I don't know how long your visits are, but she probably isn't keeping up that lucidity all waking hours, and the ability to put on a good show when needed or stimulated by a visitor is well known here on the forum.

But equally from what you have written before, caring for her was taking its toll on you. Whilst she may have improved in terms of being able to hold a better conversation with you, the likelihood is that her abilities in terms of her physical care or needs is no better, nor her mental abilities.

Keep up the response that she is still recuperating, and that the doctors say she must stay there for a bit - I know that is not telling the whole truth, but I think you need a white lie to keep her from thinking that she is going home.

Having said all that, some members have taken their family member home from care - if that is your wish, the decision is up to you.

Enjoy the good bits, and try not to be pulled down by the guilt monster x

 

[Noorza]

One thing I have learned is that here is no "normal" she will fluctuate, today for us there were no signs of dementia, perfectly lucid, but seeing red blobs in front of her eyes which the the eye department so far have said are not her eyes (last time vision was interrupted it was a TIA. There's no normal, it's all so very unpredictable. For over a week now I have been a beautiful daughter, soon she will lose it again and I'll be dodging fists, that's if it goes the same way as before but who knows.

Just be glad she's in a better place and has been said, give the guilt monster a kick up the butt from me.