I havent posted for a while and just need to post.
Mum and Dad went into respite care just before christmas 2016 - Dad very poorly with COPD plus lots of other ailments and Mum with Vascular Dementia, blindness, lack of mobility etc. My husband and me just couldnt care for them any longer as it was so stressful. Dad passed away in February 2017 and although a horrid thing to say we honestly thought mum would follow shortly after as they had been married for over 60 years.. However it wasnt her time and she never mentioned him apart from really evil nasty stories which we put down to the dementia.
The stories continued and her mobility declined until March last year when she had a nasty fall and ended up in hospital with a suspected dislocated hip, she was taken to surgery twice for manipulation but this was unsuccessful and because of her being so frail she was sent back to the care home for care but she was bedbound and didnt have any pain which I am very thankful for - not sure how this happens because I had experienced her pain many years ago when her hip was dislocated before - awful experience.
Obviously this was in lock down and although the carehome kept me informed I did not see mum until her 90th birthday in November and I was so shocked. She had lost around 2st was totally disorientated and yelling and wailing as her only form of communication, if that is what it was.
After lockdown I had a visit arranged but I was hospitalised and went to see her 2 weeks ago. Totally different person, was chatty although I couldnt always understand her and she reckoned that I was older than her and she had no children yet - we did laugh.
I went to visit on Monday and was hopeful for a similar visit but it wasnt to be. Although I chatted away with her held her hand she didnt really wake at all - her eyes opened a few times but there was no response to me holding her hand or talking to her.
She is on a soft diet and being spoon fed but is only eating a bit and doesnt always reach her liquid target. Double incontinence and has to be manually moved every few hours just adds to her wows. What quality of life has she got?
I know the string is as long as it wants to be but I am amazed how she keeps going? I guess time will take as long as it wants to continue this horrid life for my mum.
I dont even know what questions I want to ask - just wanted to put this in writing.
Mum and Dad went into respite care just before christmas 2016 - Dad very poorly with COPD plus lots of other ailments and Mum with Vascular Dementia, blindness, lack of mobility etc. My husband and me just couldnt care for them any longer as it was so stressful. Dad passed away in February 2017 and although a horrid thing to say we honestly thought mum would follow shortly after as they had been married for over 60 years.. However it wasnt her time and she never mentioned him apart from really evil nasty stories which we put down to the dementia.
The stories continued and her mobility declined until March last year when she had a nasty fall and ended up in hospital with a suspected dislocated hip, she was taken to surgery twice for manipulation but this was unsuccessful and because of her being so frail she was sent back to the care home for care but she was bedbound and didnt have any pain which I am very thankful for - not sure how this happens because I had experienced her pain many years ago when her hip was dislocated before - awful experience.
Obviously this was in lock down and although the carehome kept me informed I did not see mum until her 90th birthday in November and I was so shocked. She had lost around 2st was totally disorientated and yelling and wailing as her only form of communication, if that is what it was.
After lockdown I had a visit arranged but I was hospitalised and went to see her 2 weeks ago. Totally different person, was chatty although I couldnt always understand her and she reckoned that I was older than her and she had no children yet - we did laugh.
I went to visit on Monday and was hopeful for a similar visit but it wasnt to be. Although I chatted away with her held her hand she didnt really wake at all - her eyes opened a few times but there was no response to me holding her hand or talking to her.
She is on a soft diet and being spoon fed but is only eating a bit and doesnt always reach her liquid target. Double incontinence and has to be manually moved every few hours just adds to her wows. What quality of life has she got?
I know the string is as long as it wants to be but I am amazed how she keeps going? I guess time will take as long as it wants to continue this horrid life for my mum.
I dont even know what questions I want to ask - just wanted to put this in writing.