Since he went on dialysis mid last month his mental function - already on the wane - hit the wall and he was left shaking tissue boxes thinking they were cigarettes and talking incomprehensible sentences most of the time. He had already become convinced that he wasn't in his house and that we had kidnapped him which was very distressing as he got aggressive verbally. We hadn't been through any of the denial and anger before which you often read about though in the last few years before now, because he had an ability to simply laugh and joke about his conditions (he used to say "it would be easier to list what I haven't got wrong with me" when reading doctors reports). From mid-last year onwards his wife was increasingly on the recieving end of rants and outbursts when she refused to make him tea at 3am in the morning or didn't agree with one of his statements, even though they came out as "don't you think that sunshine cap makes a good module for the backdrop" or other heartbreaking sentences, yet she continues to visit him every day, the love they have for each other still, and paticularly her for him, is extraordinary to witness. In a sense it is inevitable that he was to go into hospital or a nursing home as she just could not cope anymore and already has hypertension. She had stuck by him all the way and already has hypertension. She had stuck by him all the way, and in the end it was the hospital that erm hospitalised him, but she had began to break down crying and say things about him which spoke of not her been caring but just the sheer amount of frustration she had. He had threatened to leave and much other things but didn't apologise often because mostly he didn't remember it. It's just been terrible to watch him fade into the void like this. He was admitted to hospital in the middle of this month because his wife couldn't get him out of bed for dialysis after two frustrating hours. She called an ambulance and he was taken into A&E but after several hours of testing and scans they decided he should remain in and discovered shingles. He has an absolute deluge of serious medical problems: heart failure (left ventricular), ischaemic heart disease, hypertension, type ii diabetes, vascular dementia and, since last month, end stage renal failure as well as c-dif he contracted in hospital. The treating doctors think he has had either a stroke or a TIA earlier in the month which would explain how he failed to get out of bed for three or four days and a CT scan supported this as well as other smaller undetected strokes. Until this last Thursday he had shown no sign of improvement whatsoever, required oxygen and barely spoke. We were having discussions with the doctors about stopping dialysis which they too were in favour of if he didn't improve in the near future. To confound his trouble he also contracted the infection. But on the Thursday, after a blood transfusion and with two drips in place, he became much more awake. Obviously his dementia has worsened, and we think he may be confined to bed for some time - if not all the time - but generally this isn't our prinicple concern as he was left severely disabled by a motorcycle accident a few decades ago. He still retains insight into the past but his recognition skills are next to none. He does not know where he is and sometimes who he is with and often says things like "okay then, let's go down the pub" or "i think i'll go upstairs to bed now" (he hasn't been out of bed since he was admitted to hospital) as well as much more abstract thoughts like "i don't think that ship will make a good vet" and "what shall we go to the fancy dress party as" as well as a preoccupiation with insurance and banking, presumably due to his former career. The strange thing is that in hand with this he has much clarity that we did not expect such as when he asked what year it was, and we told him 2007, he said "2007. That's a good year for the queen, it's her 60th wedding anniversary" but obviously he'd forgot this as tonight he again asked what year it was. When we ask him how he is, something we do shortly after saying 'hello' usually, he inevitably replies "bl**dy awful" or "still alive but horrible otherwise" then during the time we're with him it goes either way but generally leans towards the dementia if he is initiating conversation, and not so much if he is on the opposite end. BUT he can't eat or drink for himself since this latest stroke so we have to do that for him along with the nurses and he also hasn't read or watched TV in months nor can he listen to radio except for Classical because he confuses all the news and thinks the street is been bombed or we've been taken hostage. He is 79 y.o btw. When we go he says goodnight, usually not by name, and asks us to come tomorrow, even though we haven't missed hardly a session yet. The ward has a limit of 2 visitors but because he is in a side ward (first due to shingles and now because of c-dif, much handwashing along with aprons and rubber gloves) we sometimes have over this number (something the nurses and doctors find hysterical when they come in) which he enjoys because he knows the voices even if he doesn't remember the names all the time. Say last night I said "If I don't come next time, I'll probably see you on Monday" to which he replies "Okay then, take care son" and you wouldn't even know there was anything wrong with him. So as it is now he is continuing the dialysis. Getting him back home is not that important to us though as he doesn't recognise his home anyway and if he had to go into a nursing home my mother manages one nearby and he is generally more content in his private side ward than he was at home, which he first said was a hotel and then became a uni dorm but is yet to become, in his mind, a hospital ward. Dementia has proven to be the most horrid condition to deal with, and I have nothing but sympathy and admiration for those long-suffering spouses and relatives who persist because they still care for and love the person behind the condition, living in it's shadow. Also I apologise if this is too long as I've never posted on a dementia forum before.