1. rachels3185

    rachels3185 Registered User

    Dec 20, 2007
    7
    East Yorkshire
    Hi all

    Dad's been in the local care home for 7 weeks now, all in all it was going down as well as could be expected, he had good days and bad days, sometimes telling us it was time to go home and somtimes telling us it was time he went home. This last weekend things seemed to have changed, he has been climbing on the patio furniture and has been upset with himself, in his own way making it quite clear that he want's out, yesterday he went into what can only be described as depression, hardly said a word to mum or sis when they visited. There is no way mum could cope an even with full time carer's, so we know that the care home is the right place for dad, but why the sudden change?

    Has anyone experienced this?

    rach
     
  2. Brucie

    Brucie Registered User

    Jan 31, 2004
    12,413
    near London
    Hi Rach

    Unfortunately, depression is part of the package with dementia - often diagnosis is delayed as doctors chase the depression route, not realising that it is a symptom, not a condition in itself.

    I always try to put myself in the position of my wife, and others at her care home. After a life where they could, on a whim, go anywhere and do what they wanted - suddenly, for no apparent reason [to them] they are shut in a place with lots of strange folk, both residents and carers.

    Suddenly they have little choice over food, they find their personal care being appropriated by others.

    I know what I would think... "let's get outta here!" Dad's change may be because he has put up with it for what he feels is long enough.

    A major challenge of being a carer of someone who has dementia is that we have to do things we don't like, and they don't like - and may blame us for - but that we know are for their own good.

    Generally a home, and the GP/consultant, will take time for the person to settle, and to amend details of care, and even medication, to help.

    Have you spoken to the home manager and the GP? Might be an idea, and in any case, it is always good to establish a relationship with them from the start.
     

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