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Institutional abuse


Registered User
Jun 14, 2014
Hello everyone,
I have written a couple of times on this forum, it always seems to be with bad news. My father is in the advanced stages of dementia and we had suspicions that certain care workers in the home that he is in were not shall we say, in it for the right reasons. I wrote about this a while back so I won't go into details but we recorded two care workers abusing my dad. These individuals have since being banned from working with vulnerable adults and the local authority who investigated this have now 'closed' the case.

Here's my point, we never received an apology. I was under the impression that this sort of thing with the recording that I have would be very damaging for the care home and holding company in question. Why is it that everything has gone silent?

There were multiple problems with the care home (still are) and we kept a diary of everything from being put to bed at 4pm, being left in dirty pads, not drinking enough fluid, being dressed in other peoples clothes.... (I could go on). The council suddenly found the extra funding to put my dad in a better care home and in November 2014 he was moved. Since this date we have heard nothing from the Council or his previous care home.

During my dads abuse in his old care home his dad (my grandad) died; watching someone with dementia grieve is incredibly difficult as the stages get muddled up.

For the sake of my dad, the other residents in the old care home (who don't have family) and my granddad I want to shine the light on this case and go public. I would like an apology from the care home owners, I would like to tell my story on behalf of my dad and my mum with the intention of making such a massive wave that things in his old home would change forever. I would also like to draw the tax payers attention to the Council and how useless they are - we see a lot in the press about vulnerable children but my suspicion is that many vulnerable adults are slipping through the net due to local authorities inability to safe guard.

My granddad would be turning in his grave and would want me to fight the corner of those who don't have the strength to do so. This situation has sucked the life out of my mum who cannot move on and she now mistrusts everyone who comes near my dad.

So..... how can I/should I do this? If I do do it I want to do it in a way that does not jeopardise this new equilibrium we have.

I just feel that this needs to be addressed.



Registered User
Jun 15, 2014
I would suggest that you won't get an apology as that would admit liability. I could be wrong.
I am so angry on your behalf.
This is the type of thing that should be highlighted to yhe care minister, Norman Lamb.
Please seek advice from a solicitor for the sake of your dad and all our other vulnerable loved ones.
Take care


Registered User
Jan 30, 2009
I quite agree that you should have had an apology, and completely understanding you wanting to see radical change rather than just two people sacked. The blame is with the management equally if not more.

The first thing to establish is have you gone through the official complaints procedure of the care home, to the letter?

I am not a legal type person but plenty of people on here know quite a lot about the right way of doing things, and I am sure they will be along to answer you, but one thing I DO know is that unless you have followed the complaints procedure you can't progress to the next step with any hope of things being dealt with properly


Registered User
Jan 20, 2014
I agree they you may be unlikely to get an apology as it admits liability. I am so sorry for the dreadful time your father and the other residents suffered. I don't know, but I would have thought it might be worth talking to someone at the local paper, or finding out who has carried out investigations into care homes for the tv. I can't remember if you already did this but were the care home commision involved before? I would write them a very detailed report on things that happen/ed at the home.
You are absolutely right to keep going on this, we owe it to every elderly person who has no one to fight their corner to do what we can to stop poor practices in care homes. Let us know what you decide to do, it will be useful info for all of us.

Sue J

Registered User
Dec 9, 2009
All power to your elbow, Red Squirrel.

So sorry for what your family has gone to. Similar seems to have sucked the life out of me to. It is failure on a huge scale, I've seen it, see it:( makes me weep. Especially as you say for those who have no voice.

Best wishes


Registered User
May 20, 2009
The buzz word these days seems to be transparency.
If they say it enough times we may believe them.
However it seems the reality is anything but.

I do hope you are successful redsquirrel,
and I hope others may advise how best this can be achieved.

It goes without saying that my heart aches for anyone in homes who suffer abuse.
Maybe if they started by publicly punishing the perpetrators is would send a clear warning to others.:(

Wishing you all the very best.
Geum xxx

Emily M

Registered User
Jan 20, 2015
Name and Shame

Hello redsquirrel

I am pleased your father is now in a beter care home.

I would have no hesitation in exposing the poor care home in the media, if the local authority will not act, especially as other vulnerable people are still at risk.

Make sure you have got all your facts right with definite evidence if you do go public.

Best of luck.



Registered User
May 28, 2013
It's good to read of your determination,red squirrel,and I wish you the best of luck.
For my tuppence worth,find out as quickly as possible what people/agencies are going to do and when.Dont get bogged down and waste your time and expectations on plausable do nothings.
You need to find the big guns,the ones where the buck stops.There are so many waste of space,waste of time apologists who will drain the life-blood out of you.
If I had done a little research to find out ALL the concerned agencies and their remits,including mps and ministers,I could have saved blood and time.Nothing worse than a useless[fill in accordingly] carrying a card that they cannot play.
You'll need a strategy,I think, for the persistent denial and ignoring of the legitimacy of your concerns.
One thing I read on this forum was keep writng.Dont be polite.Dont wait and waste.
I wish you well.