Incontinence in someone with dementia (as apposed to those "oops" moments) is certainly a bit of a game changer for us carers?
I remember being totally overwhelmed when my wife started having problems and went through a whole range of suggested solutions (liners, pads etc). I ended up using Tena Super pull-ups (other makes are available
) which she took to wearing okay. They seem to contain things most of the time, with only occasional leakage, thankfully usually at night.
After a few weeks of having to launder the bed sheets, mattress protectors etc, I followed the recommendations from others on TP and bought a couple of washable "kylie" type protectors (the 86cm x 89cm approx type, rather than a whole sheet), which she seems fine to lay on. This way, I only have to wash her PJ's and protector, which is a whole load easier.
I was fortunate that after having purchased the pull-ups for around 9 months, I managed to get our NHS incontinence service to provide these for free (enough for 4 a day, in out area).
Again, following advice, I started trying what some call "preemptive toileting", where I take my wife to the loo at regular intervals. It's not fool proof, as she doesn't always "go" (others will relate to the amount of time spent hanging around waiting), but I do think it has helped her retain some sense of control. It has also reduced the number of pants she needs, meaning I have built up a bit of a stock, which is my safety net for when she does get through more.
A lot obviously depends on the person being cooperative with wearing the various products, so it's a case of trial and error.
Good luck@tuffydawn