In need of a virtual hug

Louby65

Registered User
Mar 26, 2014
620
0
Scotland
Hi rob , unfortunately my mum never goes for a nap in the afternoon so I never get a catch up nap . She's gone to bed now so think it won't be long till I go to bed myself . Went for a run , shopping , gave her a shower , done her hair and painted her nails , so hopefully she will sleep well . Hope you had a good day . Take care . Lou
 

nae sporran

Registered User
Oct 29, 2014
9,213
0
Bristol
Hi rob , unfortunately my mum never goes for a nap in the afternoon so I never get a catch up nap . She's gone to bed now so think it won't be long till I go to bed myself . Went for a run , shopping , gave her a shower , done her hair and painted her nails , so hopefully she will sleep well . Hope you had a good day . Take care . Lou

Evening Lou, sorry you don't have that option. We had a quiet day watching football and dozing.
Hope your mum has a better night now she has been pampered and that lets you rest. All the best. Rob
 

hvml

Registered User
Oct 10, 2015
297
0
North Cornwall
Evening Rob and Louby.

I'm just back from my weekend away. Had a great time thanks. Cooked some nice things and chatted and knitted and slept a bit longer than usual and walked around amongst people, which is novel after the village. Dad's scan has been brought forward to Tuesday with a second angioplasty in mind as his ankle is not healing, so it will be good to get that ball rolling. I hope you have had a nice weekend All the best, Heidi x

Evening Exhausted.

I hope that this week has seen some improvement in your Dad's condition and that he is more comfortable. I also hope that you are ok and looking after yourself.

Take care, lots of love, Heidi xx
 

nae sporran

Registered User
Oct 29, 2014
9,213
0
Bristol
Evening Rob and Louby.

I'm just back from my weekend away. Had a great time thanks. Cooked some nice things and chatted and knitted and slept a bit longer than usual and walked around amongst people, which is novel after the village. Dad's scan has been brought forward to Tuesday with a second angioplasty in mind as his ankle is not healing, so it will be good to get that ball rolling. I hope you have had a nice weekend All the best, Heidi x

Evening Exhausted.

I hope that this week has seen some improvement in your Dad's condition and that he is more comfortable. I also hope that you are ok and looking after yourself.

Take care, lots of love, Heidi xx

Morning Heidi. Glad you had a nice weekend away, always good to get some sleep. Good luck with the scan tomorrow.

Best wishes to you, Exhausted and your dad. Rob
 

Louby65

Registered User
Mar 26, 2014
620
0
Scotland
Hello everyone , hope you are all ok ?
Heidi , that's good that you had a lovely weekend . How did your dad get on today ?
Rob , I hope you and your OH are doing ok? My best wishes to you both .
Exhausted , I hope you and your dad are ok ? I do hope things are a bit better ?
Things are a bit worrying with my mum. I was told yesterday by one of the carers at her day centre that they are having difficulty with my mums toileting requirements and hinted she may not be able to come anymore . I rely heavily on this centre as it allows me , along with paying for a carer, to continue going to work , so I'm really worried about it . I tried to phone the manager today but she was off . Will try again tomorrow . I'm keeping my fingers crossed they will continue to support my mum . She really loves her day centre and has been attending for 22years. It's been my lifeline . I don't know what I will do if they say she can't come , im trying so hard not to put my mum in a care home . Spoke to my family about the possibility of her not being welcome at the centre , but as always they seemed disinterested . Keep your fingers crossed that everything goes okay please .
Sending everyone my best wishes . Lou
 

exhausted 2015

Registered User
Jul 5, 2015
624
0
stoke on trent
Hello everyone , hope you are all ok ?
Heidi , that's good that you had a lovely weekend . How did your dad get on today ?
Rob , I hope you and your OH are doing ok? My best wishes to you both .
Exhausted , I hope you and your dad are ok ? I do hope things are a bit better ?
Things are a bit worrying with my mum. I was told yesterday by one of the carers at her day centre that they are having difficulty with my mums toileting requirements and hinted she may not be able to come anymore . I rely heavily on this centre as it allows me , along with paying for a carer, to continue going to work , so I'm really worried about it . I tried to phone the manager today but she was off . Will try again tomorrow . I'm keeping my fingers crossed they will continue to support my mum . She really loves her day centre and has been attending for 22years. It's been my lifeline . I don't know what I will do if they say she can't come , im trying so hard not to put my mum in a care home . Spoke to my family about the possibility of her not being welcome at the centre , but as always they seemed disinterested . Keep your fingers crossed that everything goes okay please .
Sending everyone my best wishes . Lou

Oh Lou I'm so sorry to read your post I do hope that your mum will be allowed to stay at her day centre it must be so worrying for you if I've understood you your job helps to pay for her care and if she can't go to the day centre any longer will you be forced to think about residential care ..what a situation ...and yes other family members tend to leave all to the carer I've experienced this even with decision making ...Im sending YOU a big hug for a change xxx please keep us posted ....I've been meaning to post for a day or two now but as usual been busy and also at the hospital everyday dad is not able to maintain his oxygen levels so we may be looking at permanent oxygen also his heart scan showed moderate heart failure ,theres one bit of good news the blood is no longer present in his urine ....hope that everyone else is OK and hope that Heidi enjoyed her weekend with oh ..sorry for the delay yet again ..will be thinking of you all especially Lou ...goodnight all hope that it is a peaceful one xxxxx
 

hvml

Registered User
Oct 10, 2015
297
0
North Cornwall
Hi Exhausted, Rob and Louby
I hope you have had a good night . What a difficult situation re the day care, Lou. I really hope that you can find a way round it.

I'm glad to hear that at least on one count, your Dad has seen some improvement, Exhausted. A sign that he is responding to some of the treatment and may respond to more as time progresses.

Yesterday didn't go so good. They said that there is nothing more they can do to improve the blood flow, so we are looking at maintaining the ulcer. That, or amputation. So we will maintain the ulcer. I keep Dad on regular painkillers and between me and the nurses, the dressing is changed every day. We will just have to continue like that and hope that it will manage to heal. The trip itself was absolutely fine, just the outcome was disappointing.


Hi Rob. We have been having some lovely bright,cold weather, which I find much better for the spirits than rain. Maybe you and OH will be able to wrap up and go out? I can hear Dad shouting, so it's time to start the day. Have a good one, all of you.

Lots of love, Heidi xx
 

Louby65

Registered User
Mar 26, 2014
620
0
Scotland
Hi Heidi , I had a wee smile on my face at how you ended your chat , 'it's time to start the day'. When my mum wakens and her monitor goes off I always say to myself ' and my day begins' into myself . I'm sorry to hear that they can't do much more to improve your dads circulation . It's such a worry , but hopefully looking after the ulcer will keep his condition maintained . Looking after our mums, dads and partners is such a worry .
Thank you exhausted for your kind words and hug - it's just what I needed ! I'm glad the haematuria has settled for your dad . It would be good if his oxygen requirements improved but if being on continuous oxygen therapy is the only option then I'm sure it will be fine . It's amazing how adaptable and accepting we all become to continue looking after them .
I went to see the care manager at my mums day centre . She was lovely and very supportive . She said she would not withdraw any service and would continue to assist my mum . What a relief , I could have hugged her . She just asked that my mum not go on their summer day trips in case she had an accident on the bus , which I think is perfectly reasonable . They only go out about 6 trips over 3, months . I can organise time off to look after her and take her on a trip myself . So I'm breathing a sigh of relief just now . Thank you everyone for kind words of support . Hope everyone has a good day, keep us all posted on any developments . Take care , Lou X
 

nae sporran

Registered User
Oct 29, 2014
9,213
0
Bristol
Evening Lou, that's good news on the day centre front. :) Did you think any more about taking your mum away for a few days, or just try a few daytrips? I hope you can both enjoy a few nice trips out together soon.

Evening Exhausted. Not sure whether to be pleased for your dad no longer having blood in his urine or to send hugs and best wishes for dealing with his heart problem and oxygen shortage, but like Lou says he will hopefully adapt.

Evening Heidi. Sorry about your dad's bad news, really hope you can stay on top of that ulcer with dressings and nursing. Sending you cyber strength for all that nursing.

We had a busy morning after a bit of incontinence, seems to flare up for no reason. Luckily OH does forget all about it after an hour or so and I seem to have got into a routine with dry stuff ready. At least we then got off for some tea and cakes, though she seemed reluctant to even try any new shoes and the old ones no longer hurt. :)

All the best to you all for as peaceful night as possible and hopefully a better day tomorrow. Rob
 

exhausted 2015

Registered User
Jul 5, 2015
624
0
stoke on trent
Evening Lou, that's good news on the day centre front. :) Did you think any more about taking your mum away for a few days, or just try a few daytrips? I hope you can both enjoy a few nice trips out together soon.

Evening Exhausted. Not sure whether to be pleased for your dad no longer having blood in his urine or to send hugs and best wishes for dealing with his heart problem and oxygen shortage, but like Lou says he will hopefully adapt.

Evening Heidi. Sorry about your dad's bad news, really hope you can stay on top of that ulcer with dressings and nursing. Sending you cyber strength for all that nursing.

We had a busy morning after a bit of incontinence, seems to flare up for no reason. Luckily OH does forget all about it after an hour or so and I seem to have got into a routine with dry stuff ready. At least we then got off for some tea and cakes, though she seemed reluctant to even try any new shoes and the old ones no longer hurt. :)

All the best to you all for as peaceful night as possible and hopefully a better day tomorrow. Rob

Good evening all ...Lou I was really pleased to hear that your mum can continue at her day centre..what a relief it must be for you ...Heidi Im sorry to read about your dads ulcer I hope that it can be maintained as amputation would be horrific for you both please keep us posted ..and rob p!eased to hear that you managed to go for tea and cakes and that oh soon got over her incontinence ..I know my dad does get upset when it happens which is quite frequent these days ..and shedrech I hope that you and your dad are OK ...I've been to see dad today ...poor thing he is so down and saying he's had enough it took all my strength not to weep ...doctor had a word with me they are now thinking he may have a blood clot on his lung or it may be copd which is causing low oxygen levels and has been seen by the oxygen nurse ..so he faces a few more tests and possibility a Lung scan .his sleep log had recorded that he had been awake all night I suppose some of his low mood is down to tiredness... I hope he is not so down tomorrow ..goodnight all god bless ..xxxxx
 

hvml

Registered User
Oct 10, 2015
297
0
North Cornwall
Morning all.

The nurse who came yesterday was surprised about what the consultant had said and according to her, the wound is showing signs of improvement. It's a blessing that Dad was having a sleepy day and wasn't awake for the bad news. It would have distressed him.

I'm so sorry to hear that your Dad is down in Spirits, Exhausted. It must be so hard for him to be going through so much and for you to be holding yourself together. I'm thinking of you both.

I'm glad to hear that the day centre are going to continue welcoming your Mum, Louby. What a relief! And those trips out that you go on together will be special with just the two of you.

Glad you got out for tea and cakes, Rob. Little moments like that wipe out the more messy stuff and create great memories. I love to see the look on Dad's face when I offer him coffee and a biscuit .

I hope the day is a good one for you all and that you keep warm in this lovely, bright,cold snap.

Lots of love, Heidi xx
 

nae sporran

Registered User
Oct 29, 2014
9,213
0
Bristol
Morning all.

The nurse who came yesterday was surprised about what the consultant had said and according to her, the wound is showing signs of improvement. It's a blessing that Dad was having a sleepy day and wasn't awake for the bad news. It would have distressed him.

I'm so sorry to hear that your Dad is down in Spirits, Exhausted. It must be so hard for him to be going through so much and for you to be holding yourself together. I'm thinking of you both.

I'm glad to hear that the day centre are going to continue welcoming your Mum, Louby. What a relief! And those trips out that you go on together will be special with just the two of you.

Glad you got out for tea and cakes, Rob. Little moments like that wipe out the more messy stuff and create great memories. I love to see the look on Dad's face when I offer him coffee and a biscuit .

I hope the day is a good one for you all and that you keep warm in this lovely, bright,cold snap.

Lots of love, Heidi xx

Hope the nurse is right on that one Heidi, though there could be something happening underneath that only the Specialist could see. Sorry to be negative and cautious. You are doing well to protect your dad from the bad news.

Morning Exhausted. It's good news that the doctors are on the case with more tests for your dad, but it must be tiring right enough for him. I always find Christl needs a few days to recover after being in hospital, but he is in the right place for now.

All the best to you both and to Heidi and her dad, not forgetting Lou and her mum. Rob :)
 

Louby65

Registered User
Mar 26, 2014
620
0
Scotland
That's good Heidi , that the nurse said your dads ulcer is improving . I have seen many ulcers which can improve . So I'm hoping your dads is one of them . I was really relieved when the day centre told me that they would continue to support me looking after my mum. It's almost as if she knows things were a bit stressful for me this week because she got out of her chair , walked over to me and said as clear as anything ' thank you for looking after me' and gave me a hug . Some things are priceless . Even at my age , it's still good to get a hug from my mum.
Exhausted , I hope your dad is doing as well as he can . Good news about the haematuria . Have they done any tests to rule out blood clots ? I take it they are continuing to take bloods to check for anaemia , which can cause breathlessness and tiredness ? I hope you are keeping well , although Im sure the worry of your dad will be affecting your health , so please look after yourself .
Rob , how are you? Have you and your OH been enjoying these brighter days we are having . My mum loves going out for a drive , especially when there's coffee and cake involved too!
I'm off for a week now , so my mums carer is going to come a couple of days to give me a break . She says she was going to take my mum away for a couple of days in June to give me a break , which is very kind of her . She's also going to start taking my mum to stay at her house overnight on occasions . My mum goes to her house frequently and her children are very good with her . My mum loves going . She's so kind to my mum and I .
I hope everyone has a good weekend . Keep in touch and let us know how everyone is doing . Take care , Lou X
 

exhausted 2015

Registered User
Jul 5, 2015
624
0
stoke on trent
That's good Heidi , that the nurse said your dads ulcer is improving . I have seen many ulcers which can improve . So I'm hoping your dads is one of them . I was really relieved when the day centre told me that they would continue to support me looking after my mum. It's almost as if she knows things were a bit stressful for me this week because she got out of her chair , walked over to me and said as clear as anything ' thank you for looking after me' and gave me a hug . Some things are priceless . Even at my age , it's still good to get a hug from my mum.
Exhausted , I hope your dad is doing as well as he can . Good news about the haematuria . Have they done any tests to rule out blood clots ? I take it they are continuing to take bloods to check for anaemia , which can cause breathlessness and tiredness ? I hope you are keeping well , although Im sure the worry of your dad will be affecting your health , so please look after yourself .
Rob , how are you? Have you and your OH been enjoying these brighter days we are having . My mum loves going out for a drive , especially when there's coffee and cake involved too!
I'm off for a week now , so my mums carer is going to come a couple of days to give me a break . She says she was going to take my mum away for a couple of days in June to give me a break , which is very kind of her . She's also going to start taking my mum to stay at her house overnight on occasions . My mum goes to her house frequently and her children are very good with her . My mum loves going . She's so kind to my mum and I .
I hope everyone has a good weekend . Keep in touch and let us know how everyone is doing . Take care , Lou X

Good evening all ...so pleased for you Lou what a good carer your mum has and how good of her to take your mum to her home we had a good carer for dad until he went into hospita ...thank you all for asking about dad and thank you lou for your medical knowledge dad did have anaemia and had a blood transfusion the other week , he had a lung scan yezterday and have been told today that he had emphysema but thankfully no blood clot on his lung ...on chatting with the doctor today she made me aware of all dads medical problems and hinted at 24 hour nursing care because it may be too complex for me to manage at home especially with his sleeping problems ..I have been monitoring his sleep log and it mostly States awake all night shouting " hello " the doctor has prescribed more sleep meds but to no avail yet I'm really down today as I dont know what the future holds ,I think that shortly he will be moved to an assessment bed so that his needs can be assessed ...sorry to ramble on but feeling a bit defeated today ...anyway Heidi I hope that your dads leg is going OK and you too are OK ..how long for your next weekend is it three weeks ...and rob I hope that you and oh are doing OK and have managed to get out this week its been cold but nice and hope she's forgot about the pain In her foot
Oh I forgot I'm doing something useful whilst dad is in hospital ( when I find time ) I amknitting twiddle muffs for the dementia ward of our mental health hospital (which is where dad was ) they mentioned it too us so my sister and I are going to donate has many as we can knit when I have completed my first one I will post a photo has it will be an achievement for me as I'm not a knitter ..so sorry again for rambling on goodnight all ,gill xxxxx
 

hvml

Registered User
Oct 10, 2015
297
0
North Cornwall
Oh Lou, how lovely!! Moments like that make it all worthwhile. Something to treasure.

Thanks very much for your positive words about Dad's ulcer. I keep him walking as much as possible to try and improve the blood flow and keep him comfortable with painkillers. The worst time for him is the morning. After that, he doesn't usually mention pain. I might ask the nurses what they would think about using Manuka honey.

Hi Rob. Thanks for your kind words. It's important to be realistic too, I know. With so many people in the loop, we are bound to get differences of opinion.

Dad was up early this morning, shouting, so I got up and had two cuppas. Now I am going to get him up for real. May have a doze on the sofa later to make up.

Hope you are ok, Exhausted and that your Dad is comfortable.

Have a good day, all.

Lots of love, Heidi xx
 

nae sporran

Registered User
Oct 29, 2014
9,213
0
Bristol
Afternoon Heidi. I hope you get enough good weather, now spring is officially starting on Tuesday, to keep your dad moving. I know Manuka honey worked on a small cyst OH had a few years back. It was actually the practice nurse who prescribed it and applied it every day, or every other day, for about a week and a half. I think it was specialist medicinal honey, probably quite expensive if you pay for it yourself, but it worked wonders.

Afternoon Exhausted. Emphysema sounds serious, sorry to hear that for your dad. I would explore the idea of 24 hour nursing care, does that mean carers in the house or in a care home. It would give you and your sister a bit more time to relax and enjoy your knitting, look forward to the photos of your first efforts.

Enjoy the week off Lou. Your mum giving a big hug was sweet. :)

Quiet day here, OH sleeping off a busy week of walking round garden centres and of tea and cakes. The orchid looks good on the windowsill.

Best wishes to one and all. Rob
 

Louby65

Registered User
Mar 26, 2014
620
0
Scotland
Good evening everyone .
Heidi , Manila honey is excellent for ulcers . I have used many preparations on wounds etc and it has always proved excellent . It is widely used now so it wouldn't do any harm to try it. It has great antibacterial and anti inflammatory benefits . The higher the grade the better antibacterial properties ( aim for 16+) . It's worth a try .
Rob , I hope you and your OH are enjoying the better weather , especially if it means coffee and cake time too . I also have an orchid , one of my favourite flowers .
Exhausted - I feel your pain . I have been there many times worrying about the increase in dependence my mum has on me looking after her , she now has 24/7 care . She is looked after at home and someone is with her at all times . But even then I still worry . A couple of years ago when she went into hospital for the first time , which heralded her decline , I think I cried all the time . I was so worried and upset, as I didn't want to put my mum in care but wondered how I would manage . Fast forward 2 years and I am pleased that I am still looking after her but it hasn't been easy , so I hope you do what's best for you and your dad . The main thing is , keeping him safe and well cared for , while making sure that you are also ok . You will make the right decision . Please accept a big hug from me.
Best wishes everyone , enjoy the weekend . Lou X
 

Louby65

Registered User
Mar 26, 2014
620
0
Scotland
Oops sorry I have just seen my typing error . I meant to say manuka honey ( predictive texting !!!) . Just in case you try to buy Manila honey ?! Lol .
Lou X
 

Louby65

Registered User
Mar 26, 2014
620
0
Scotland
Hello everyone . I hope you are all doing okay ?
Exhausted , how are you and your dear dad . I hope he's getting stronger ?
Heidi - how's your dads ulcer , I hope it's showing signs of improvement ?
Rob - I hope you are getting out and about sampling lots of coffee and cakes with your OH. It's a bit cold where I live tonight , snow is predicted . The weather is so unpredictable , you wouldn't believe the beautiful , warm day it was on Sunday in Loch Lomond . Then today we are back to gloves and scarves !
I haven't seen shedrech post for a while but I hope him and his dad are doing ok.
Everything okay with my mum and I . I bought a new car today . I brought my mum so she could go in and out of them and also so that I could fit the wheelchair in etc . I have quite a big car at present ( 4x4) , but my mum was finding it really difficult to get in and out of it . I really loved the car but had to get one that was more practical . Came home and my washing machine broke and couldn't be fixed . So a new one is coming on sat . Had to buy a new fridge last month . What's that old saying , it comes In 3's . I so hope it's wrong !!
Best wishes everyone . Keep well.
Lou X