Hi,
Long post warning, need to vent.
It's been a while. November 2012 when I joined seeking advice about mam's first appt. at the memory clinic. Obviously lots has happened since but just last month we were finally given a diagnosis of dementia, Vascular or Alzheimer's dependant on the result of the latest scan.
The situation is this. I don't work, (medically retd. due to ptsd), I am a single parent to a 17 yr old who has autistic traits, severe anxiety, depression etc. Mam and dad live close and I see them most days.
Unfortunately mam has had it in her head for some time that dad is having an affair. Long story, totally unfounded, but hey, that's what you get.
Dad is struggling, not the best at the emotional stuff, brought mam to mine yesterday. Had a great night, lots of laughs etc. Today mam said something about dad within my dd's hearing. She kicked off telling her grandma she shouldn't say that. Mam got upset, wanted to leave. Took her home after a drive around while she calmed down. She didn't want to go home. Says she doesn't have a home anymore as it's been "infiltrated".
She wants to live with me and if I could, I would. But we live in a very small 2 bed house. It just isn't feasible. I have suggested to my daughter that we could move into my parent's house and my dad move into ours. She absolutely refuses.
Daughter is now furious with me for "choosing" my mam over her.
Mam is so upset she refuses to come to my house again.
Dad is stuck.
I just don't know what to do.
I want to look after my mam. I have tried to explain to my daughter that mam now has a limited life span, I want to make the most of it, but she won't listen.
I want to help my dad, having mam here is the best way of giving him a break.
I want to help my daughter and support her.
How the hell do I do it all and keep everyone happy?!
Sorry. Huge rant I know. If you have got to the end of this well done. Please don't worry about leaving a reply, I just needed to get it off my chest.
Hope all are well and coping
Mary
X
Long post warning, need to vent.
It's been a while. November 2012 when I joined seeking advice about mam's first appt. at the memory clinic. Obviously lots has happened since but just last month we were finally given a diagnosis of dementia, Vascular or Alzheimer's dependant on the result of the latest scan.
The situation is this. I don't work, (medically retd. due to ptsd), I am a single parent to a 17 yr old who has autistic traits, severe anxiety, depression etc. Mam and dad live close and I see them most days.
Unfortunately mam has had it in her head for some time that dad is having an affair. Long story, totally unfounded, but hey, that's what you get.
Dad is struggling, not the best at the emotional stuff, brought mam to mine yesterday. Had a great night, lots of laughs etc. Today mam said something about dad within my dd's hearing. She kicked off telling her grandma she shouldn't say that. Mam got upset, wanted to leave. Took her home after a drive around while she calmed down. She didn't want to go home. Says she doesn't have a home anymore as it's been "infiltrated".
She wants to live with me and if I could, I would. But we live in a very small 2 bed house. It just isn't feasible. I have suggested to my daughter that we could move into my parent's house and my dad move into ours. She absolutely refuses.
Daughter is now furious with me for "choosing" my mam over her.
Mam is so upset she refuses to come to my house again.
Dad is stuck.
I just don't know what to do.
I want to look after my mam. I have tried to explain to my daughter that mam now has a limited life span, I want to make the most of it, but she won't listen.
I want to help my dad, having mam here is the best way of giving him a break.
I want to help my daughter and support her.
How the hell do I do it all and keep everyone happy?!
Sorry. Huge rant I know. If you have got to the end of this well done. Please don't worry about leaving a reply, I just needed to get it off my chest.
Hope all are well and coping
Mary
X