1. Expert Q&A: Protecting a person with dementia from financial abuse - Weds 26 June, 3:30-4:30 pm

    Financial abuse can have serious consequences for a person with dementia. Find out how to protect a person with dementia from financial abuse.

    Sam, our Knowledge Officer (Legal and Welfare Rights) is our expert on this topic. She will be here to answer your questions on Wednesday 26 June between 3:30 - 4:30 pm.

    You can either post questions >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll answer as many as we can on the day.

  1. Starter

    Starter Registered User

    Oct 10, 2015
    We are just 10 days into mum's diagnosis. Today she said that she isn't taking her medication or going back to the hospital because the dr had whispered in her ear that she had schitzophrenia and dementia. I told her that was untrue because I was there, but she genuinely believes its true. What do I do? This is so new to me
  2. fizzie

    fizzie Registered User

    Jul 20, 2011
    It may be that she is really worried about both of these things and they are on her mind and so she is stressing. It might not be much good trying to dissuade her - My ma spent 4 years denying she had any kind of memory loss and the rest of us were idiots - i suspect i might be a bit like that too lol. One day very close to the end she said to me "Do you know I think I really do forget things sometimes" oh my I did laugh (inwardly) but still passed it off with an oh well never mind I do too or something similar!!

    It may be helpful just to reiterate that the doctor said....blah blah but i think the main thing at this early stage (and any stage) is to reassure her that all is well in whatever way feels comfortable to you. Fear plays a large part in the stress associated with memory loss and stress causes agitation which makes things a whole lot worse so gentle reassurance and kind distraction would be my recommendations

    By the way, welcome to TP. Loads of help and friendship on here xx
  3. ElizabethAnn

    ElizabethAnn Registered User

    Jan 4, 2014
    North Hampshire
  4. Shedrech

    Shedrech Volunteer Moderator

    Dec 15, 2012
    I would drop the whole issue for now - you won't persuade her otherwise and may just ingrain a negative response.
    She's not exactly in denial, she is no longer really able to think the situation through on a rational level.
    Distract her with something pleasurable and don't yourself bring up the diagnosis or appointment. On the day just take her as if you are going out for some treat - and happen to have to pop in on the way - maybe even pretend the appointment is for you.
    As for the meds - I would tell my dad it was time for his meds very matter of factly and offer tablet and water as if this were just nothing out of the ordinary. Don't ASK if he wants to take them - questions will get NO answers. At any resistance just take them away. Don't explain or argue. Don't get into whys or who said so or where they came from or even that she has never taken any pills before. Do offer them again 10-20 minutes later, again no fuss and definitely no reminder that you'd tried this before - maybe in another place eg call her into the kitchen to choose a biscuit and just happen to have the meds there too.
    Check with the consultant/GP which if any meds MUST be taken and which you can safely leave if she keeps resisting. Dad's consultant said not to force the issue and start a war when peace was more important than the meds.
    Just because she refuses once does not mean she will refuse next time. Though if she continues ask if they can be in liquid form and maybe hidden in a drink or crushed and hidden in food - but don't just do this as some pills should not be crushed.
  5. Starter

    Starter Registered User

    Oct 10, 2015
    Thank you. I already feel better knowing this forum exists x

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