I'm so upset and angry with my dad but I can't help it. Help me

[Nev lights]

I'm 16 years old and my dad is 54 with moderate (nearing later stages of Alzheimer's). He was showing symptoms from 46 so when when I was 8 but didn't get a diagnosis until he was 50 so I was 12. Life has been so hard from that point, I went through bullying at school because I was depressed about my dad and didn't speak to people who were supposed to be my friends, they bullied me the most. As the 4 years have passed dad has got progressively worse and it upsets me and makes me cry all the time. I'm so angry with him for getting Alzheimer's even though it's not his fault but sometimes It makes me feel better to blame him for it. Honestly it doesn't feel like I have a dad anymore, I am more of a parent to him than he is to me. I dress him, make him food, do most things for him. These days he acts like a child and I can't get over that, it's horrible and I hate it. He's not my dad now, he's someone totally different and I struggle to cope with that. When I was younger he would never lay a finger on me or even shout at me but he now makes me cry by doing this. He shouts in my face and slams a door only cm's Infront of my nose, even when I haven't said anything nasty to him. I can't cope with any of this, I'm at a time where I really need my dad but I feel like I haven't got him...

 

[Quilty]

Please go and talk to someone you trust at school tomorrow. You need to get support as you cannot cope with this without help.

I wish there was more I could say or do but go and talk.
Sending you a hug. Love quilty

 

[Izzy]

I'm so sorry to read about your situation Nev Lights. You have had such a hard time. It sounds as if you have such a great responsibility for your dad. Does he get help from any carers?

Is your mum at home with you too? I'm imagining if she is she must know how you feel. You both need help. Perhaps you could tell us a little more about that side if things. That would help people make useful suggestions.

I hope someone at your current school knows about your caring role and that they are there for you to talk to.

There is a site for young carers you might find helpful -

https://babble.carers.org

 

[Izzy]

Good morning Nev. I hope you are ok this morning.

 

[kingybell]

So sorry to hear your troubles. You are being such a strong person. Please seek some help because talking will really help you get your anger and feelings out.