I'm back....

[Irishgirl57]

Greetings, it is been a long time since I've been here. And I need to be here, amongst people understand what I'm going through. Long story short, through an increase in my aricept, I saw clarity that I haven't experienced in a very long time. I stopped doing all the things that helped me relate to my illness, kept me grounded, and help others understand what it's like to live with this disease.

Well, I thought I was better. Denial does strange things to people. Everyone around me kept commenting how well I was doing, so it was easy to fall in with what everybody was saying thinking that I was well again. Unfortunately we all know, that can't happen....

slowly I got overwhelmed, I started having memory episodes, my brain was short circuiting, I stop sharing with people, being angry with those around me because I felt powerless. everything came crashing down. I'm not in a very good place, and I've taken my family hostage with my behavior .... I have caused such havoc around me. I've hurt those closest to me and I feel terrible !

So, I'm trying to reestablish my life by coming back here and with the help of my husband, doctors and coucelors. Step one of any problem is admitting there's a problem and that I'm powerless over it ......

Thank you so much for being here.....

 

[Saffie]

I'm glad you have returned here for support though sorry that you feel that you have need of that support and have been through so much turmoil. Others will be here who can help you but be reassured that TP is always here for you. xxx

 

[Grannie G]

Welcome back Donna.

It must be a living nightmare to think you`re getting better and then to realise you are mistaken. You are very brave to accept your difficulties and recognise the worry your family endure.

It sounds as if you are well supported and well advised and I do hope recognition of the illness will take some of the pressure off you.

 

[Irishgirl57]

I'm glad you have returned here for support though sorry that you feel that you have need of that support and have been through so much turmoil. Others will be here who can help you but be reassured that TP is always here for you. xxx

Yes, it was reassuring to know that there was a place for me to go.

 

[Irishgirl57]

Welcome back Donna.

It must be a living nightmare to think you`re getting better and then to realise you are mistaken. You are very brave to accept your difficulties and recognise the worry your family endure.

It sounds as if you are well supported and well advised and I do hope recognition of the illness will take some of the pressure off you.

Wise words, a living nightmare. It was amazing how fast denial Appeared ... Came in and put a warm cozy sweater on me, and then the sweater begin to unravel and disintegrate leaving me very cold and alone with no covers....

My doctors said in the beginning that it was amazing how aware I was of my situation and my illness . But, It's a double edge sword, because I'm aware of my situation I know and feel the destruction that I cause.

Coming here was a good first step ....

 

[Irishgirl57]

A picture I created

This is my view off my balcony .... My words, gods picture

 

[Izzy]

Welcome back Donna.

 

[fizzie]

Welcome back Donna, I hope that you will share your journey with us x

 

[Irishgirl57]

I am here to share my journey and so appreciate all the love and kindness I have received. It really means so much to me..... Ready or not... Here I come