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mrs pepperpot

Registered User
Nov 12, 2010
70
south wales
After 7 years Alzheimers has finaly taken my mother from me. I feel lost at the moment and empty, I'm so glad we kept her at home.I have so much to say I cant speak for fear of a torrent of grief pouring out and scaring everyone else.so I'll hold onto it and let it out slowly a little at a time. And if I'm honest, I feel sorry for myself, my heart hurts and I have to live the rest of my life without her. I know time will heal and I will be ok but just now, tonight, im not. Is it ok at 54 to feel like an orphan?
 

Soobee

Registered User
Aug 22, 2009
2,734
South
JackyS, that made me laugh too. I was with dad when he went but he didn't want me to hold his hand so I said "fine, I'll just sit here and do as I'm told then" for which I am sure he attempted a smile. I doubt I will be there for mum - I hope she slips away peacefully in her nursing home rather than at hospital.
She did go peacefully at the nursing home but it was after a long time without water or food. Not what I wanted for her.
 

Loganberry

Registered User
Apr 23, 2011
17
Newcastle upon Tyne
Mrs Pepper pot, I lost my Mam 3 weeks ago. I am 48 and I still need her, yes, it's perfectly normal to feel as you do. I'm so sorry to hear about your mother, sending you hugs xx
 

Soobee

Registered User
Aug 22, 2009
2,734
South
After 7 years Alzheimers has finaly taken my mother from me. I feel lost at the moment and empty, I'm so glad we kept her at home.I have so much to say I cant speak for fear of a torrent of grief pouring out and scaring everyone else.so I'll hold onto it and let it out slowly a little at a time. And if I'm honest, I feel sorry for myself, my heart hurts and I have to live the rest of my life without her. I know time will heal and I will be ok but just now, tonight, im not. Is it ok at 54 to feel like an orphan?
I feel for you Mrs Pepperpot (I loved those stories). The grief will feel less intense with time but it does feel so all-enveloping at first.

It is ok to feel like an orphan at any age. I do when I see my friends talk about their parents. I'm 42 and most of them have not experienced that kind of loss yet.
 

mrs pepperpot

Registered User
Nov 12, 2010
70
south wales
Thanks for the kind words

I feel for you Mrs Pepperpot (I loved those stories). The grief will feel less intense with time but it does feel so all-enveloping at first.

It is ok to feel like an orphan at any age. I do when I see my friends talk about their parents. I'm 42 and most of them have not experienced that kind of loss yet.
This is the place where if someone says they know how you feel, they really do. I gave her a beautiful funeral, my final job for her, that's a comfort too. Im so grateful that we were able to go to the end with her at home, I have no
regrets. She leaves behind 3 geese, 14 hens, 3 cockerals,1 duck and Tip, the
collie dog. Oh and me, her only daughter and eldest brother and favourite
brother (mums not mine) although he has rather grown on me the last 5 years,
Grandchildren and a great grand daughter. The invisible brother who lived next door never did come in to see her, nor his wife or their kids, none of them came to her funeral either, it was a bit awkward at the funeral with people asking me "wheres Jeff then" I just said he couldn't help himself really as he was born without a heart ! Needless to say, As far as im concerned he no longer exists to me. Thanks to all here for the support over the last 5 years. Will it be ok to pop by now and then just to offer support ? X
 

LYN T

Registered User
Aug 30, 2012
6,960
Brixham Devon
I'm so sorry for your loss Mrs Pepperpot. A very sad time for you-you have my condolences and sympathy.

Of course you are welcome on this Forum at any time-compulsory actually:)

Take care of yourself

Lyn T XX
 

Gigglemore

Registered User
Oct 18, 2013
526
British Isles
So sorry for your loss Mrs Pepperpot, but I am glad that arranging a beautiful funeral may have brought you some relief.

Sounds like you will be kept busy caring for your Mum's feathered friends and the collie, but of course there will be a huge gap in your life now that your Mum is no longer with you.

Wishing you strength to get through these first difficult weeks and months of grieving. Take care.
 

sarafina

Registered User
Sep 28, 2009
13
After 7 years Alzheimers has finaly taken my mother from me. I feel lost at the moment and empty, I'm so glad we kept her at home.I have so much to say I cant speak for fear of a torrent of grief pouring out and scaring everyone else.so I'll hold onto it and let it out slowly a little at a time. And if I'm honest, I feel sorry for myself, my heart hurts and I have to live the rest of my life without her. I know time will heal and I will be ok but just now, tonight, im not. Is it ok at 54 to feel like an orphan?
Sweetheart, my Mum died 2 months ago and I know the raw grief you are feeling, the thought of never ever holding her warm hands and body is unbearable. You are not alone, I know exactly how you feel, hold onto the fact she's now with my Mum and others, we will be reunited eventually. Cry, let your grief out, I do every dayxxxxxxxx