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'If I get like that, put me in a home'

Jaded'n'faded

Registered User
Jan 23, 2019
1,958
0
High Peak
Today is mum's 93rd birthday. Husband and I visited and did a dance to All that Jazz dressed in sort of 20s gear much to the amusement of the care home staff. Mum stood up and waved her arms around too. It was a short visit as the pod is awful for hearing people, though according to my husband mum did say 'I'll meet you round the front'. Just as well I didn't hear that. This afternoon they have a singer to entertain her. He'll be in the pod bit and mum and some birthday guests will be the other side of the screen. Role on proper face to face visits.
Our house move is chugging along. The sale is almost complete, though another hurdle has just arisen there. Just as well as probate hasn't come through yet on the place we are buying. Pleased the stamp duty holiday has been extended as that should mean there isn't a tearing rush to move by the end of March, though I would like to get going sooner rather than later. My brother is doing OK, though progress is very slow.
This is mum and her cake last year. I'm hoping the home has some nice photos on Facebook later today as we didn't manage any good ones this morning.
View attachment 63941
Wow! Your mum looks fabulous - so glam!

My mother looked like a scary old bag lady despite me taking nice clothes in and her having a hairdo every week!
 

Sarasa

Volunteer Host
Apr 13, 2018
3,571
0
There were pictures on Facebook of my mum's birthday party yesterday afternoon. Apparently she didn't stop dancing, so that was good. This morning the manager sent me the video he took of our dance, which he thoroughly enjoyed. I forwarded it to my brother who thought it was the funniest thing he'd seen since lockdown started. I think that means he liked it. :D
 

Melles Belles

Registered User
Jul 4, 2017
781
0
South east
There were pictures on Facebook of my mum's birthday party yesterday afternoon. Apparently she didn't stop dancing, so that was good. This morning the manager sent me the video he took of our dance, which he thoroughly enjoyed. I forwarded it to my brother who thought it was the funniest thing he'd seen since lockdown started. I think that means he liked it. :D
@Sarasa .... just wait for Strictly to get in touch. They will be looking for new contestants for the autumn series.
 

Bikerbeth

Registered User
Feb 11, 2019
2,092
0
Bedford
That sounds like your Mum had a lovely birthday. So pleased you could go and visit her on the day even if the ‘pod visit’ was not ideal. As others have said your Mum looked very glamorous in the photo.
Glad you got to see some pictures of your Mum later in the day and that sounds thoughtful of the Manager to send you a video of the dance routine.
It must be a relief to have had the stamp duty extended so there is not as much pressure on. However I guess now it will be good to get moved.
 

Sarasa

Volunteer Host
Apr 13, 2018
3,571
0
There was a zoom relatives meeting on Thursday. It was mainly about when visiting can start in the home, but the activities co-ordinator talked about what a wonderful day everyone had had on Wednesday. It wasn't just the singer in the pod, but our dance in the morning had put the staff that saw it in a good mood too. Things are so tough for homes right now, that I'm glad we could cheer a few people up. We're considering a fitness routine for our next visit ;)
 

Sarasa

Volunteer Host
Apr 13, 2018
3,571
0
Not much to report this month. I've sent in gifts for Mothering Sunday and Easter, but haven't been to see mum this month. I've not got much on, but time seems to run away and I keep on putting off visiting. I've just this morning emailed to try and organise a visit for next week or the week after. I'm not sure whether the home is doing face to face visits yet, but that would be best if they are, so I have a fighting chance of understanding what mum says.
No further forward as regards moving, we're very nearly there on the sale of this place, but it's been like that for a couple of weeks. I hope we hear soon, but as probate isn't sorted on the place we're buying any delay at this end as long as the sale doesn't fall through is all to the good. I'm getting to the stage when I think it'll never happen.
In other news my brother is coming along nicely. His wife has loads of work on, which as she has always been the main breadwinner is good news. It's just great my brother is well enough to run the house and look after their son. I've also got a date for my second covid jab. Slightly shorter wait than twelve weeks and going to the same place should mean I get the Pfizer vaccine again.
 

Bikerbeth

Registered User
Feb 11, 2019
2,092
0
Bedford
I was listening to a program on the radio and they were saying now that the average conveyancing process is now taking 22 weeks. One local authority was not accepting requests for searches for 4 weeks as they have such a back log. I am not sure if that is helpful or worrying although I suspect you have gone past the search stage. If it worrying when the average was 8 weeks and 12 was considered long.
so pleased to hear that your brother is well enough to run the house and look after his son. That is a task/achievement in itself.
I hope you are able to get an indoor visit with your Mum, as you say it would make communication easier.
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
74,138
0
Kent
Good news about your brother @Sarasa. I hope he continues to improve.

I expect your second jab to be the Pfizer one. It was for me.

The centre I went to was the same centre my son and one of my friends went to and they both had the Astra Zenica jab. It looked as if there were different days for different ages
 

Sarasa

Volunteer Host
Apr 13, 2018
3,571
0
Thanks for all the good wishes about my brother. We have a family zoom every Sunday and it's great seeing him improve week by week.
I've managed to get a slot to see mum indoors next Thursday. I have to turn up early for a covid test and wait half an hour. Fingers crossed its a nice day as I'll be walking there and hope to sit in the park opposite while waiting.
Thanks for the info on the conveyancing process @Bikerbeth. Both we and our buyer had to change companies we were using for conveyancing as the original ones were swamped. I think the extension of the stamp duty holiday made everyone relax a bit too. I hope we've moved long before that ends!
 

Sarasa

Volunteer Host
Apr 13, 2018
3,571
0
Just back from visiting mum. The home is definitely opening up. I didn't have to wait in the park for the results of my test as the café area was open. They also made mum and I a cup of tea when I got to see her. Mum sat there munching biscuits and talking nonsense. The main thing I got was she was tired, so I didn't stay long and left her heading off for a nap.
I did get to see her favourite carer who says mum is much more settled, fine about having showers and though she has her feisty moments her funny, carefree side is showing through. The decline over the last two years is steep, though I guess that is to be expected.
 

Bikerbeth

Registered User
Feb 11, 2019
2,092
0
Bedford
So pleased that the visit format was better and with the small addition of a cup of tea it makes it feel a bit more normal. My Mum always asks if I want a cup of tea when I visited externally as I used to have to say I had just had one.
I am also pleased that you got to have a chat with her favourite Carer and got some positive feedback that your Mum is more settled. I think deep down we just hope our relative is content in the main or at least is still able to have some happy moments.
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
74,138
0
Kent
It sounds as if visiting will be easier soon thank goodness.

It`s not just about seeing your mum @Sarasa , it`s about checking in with carers and face to face is much more satisfactory than on the phone.
 

Sarasa

Volunteer Host
Apr 13, 2018
3,571
0
I texted my brother after my visit. I didn't send him any of the photos I took as I didn't manage to get a shot where mum looked happy, and I didn't want to upset him.
He texted back that he and his wife are hoping to visit mum soon. Brother hasn't seen mum since her birthday in March 2019, as shortly afterwards he was diagnosed with cancer and has been pretty ill until recently.
At the time mum was still living independently at home and though she spent most of the meal talking to my brother as though her were my long-dead dad ,she was so much more aware than she is now.
I think a visit will be a good idea though I think it will distress him to see how much she has declined in the last two years. I'm just pleased he now feels well enough to consider it.
 

Bikerbeth

Registered User
Feb 11, 2019
2,092
0
Bedford
Although I am sure it will be a shock to him, even if he has the updates from you, it is really good to hear that he feels he is is well enough to try a visit. I really hope he continues to improve