ideas please for things to do during care home visits

Discussion in 'Middle - later stages of dementia' started by annii1, Oct 4, 2015.

  1. annii1

    annii1 Registered User

    Jul 5, 2012
    west sussex
    I have always favoured taking mum out of the carehome when I visit. It has seemed to invigorate her and makes for an easier visit and distraction as even after 2 years mum still wants to come home, says she doesn't know anyone there. I think a lot of this is the dementia and she used to say the same when she was at home, doesn't make it easier to cope with though knowing she feels so sad and lost.
    Mum is incontinent now and it makes it more difficult to go out. I thought about taking in a nail file and polish, can't take photos as this upsets mum. Any other ideas for what I could do. I tend not to talk about family much as this upsets mum too, I feel quite limited. I tend to hold mum's hand alot too just to let her know I love her.Thank you
  2. Grey Lad

    Grey Lad Registered User

    Sep 12, 2014
    North East Lincs
    I always hold mums hand when I vist her. One thing I am thinking of doing is taking in some music when I see her again. With a bit of Frank Sinatra on I can see her feet tapping now. Any help for your situation?
  3. tryingmybest

    tryingmybest Registered User

    May 22, 2015
    Mum lives with me but she loves having her nails done each week as well as her hair which I fo for her. She also loves her music and as Grey lad said Frank Sinatras a good one and Mum really enjoyed listening to one of his cds the other day. Does Mum like films and have a tv in her room that you could play dvds of favourite films/concerts? Maybe take in some simple games or puzzles?

    When my late Father was in a home, I did tend to take him out in his wheelchair as much as I could. If your Mum wears pull ups her incontinence shouldn't be a problem. My Dad loved a trip to the local bakers for a Cornish pasty, drink or meal in the local pub, feeding the ducks on the pond just things like that made so much difference to Dads well-being and just to have the sun on his face instead of being cooped up really made him happy.

  4. marionq

    marionq Registered User

    Apr 24, 2013
    If these ladies like Frank Sinatra then they were probably dancers in their young days. At my husbands day centre they have a selection of cards with photographs of dance halls from the fifties and sixties. I sat in on a session where they talked about these - which halls they went to, what they wore, what dances they liked best, who they went with. One lady of 90 insisted she still went every Saturday night and told us all she did there.

    You might be able to get old archive photos off the internet. Easier in cities but remember church dances and dances run by trades unions and other organisations were also popular so research the area the grew up in.
  5. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    South coast
    Mum is in a CH and is incontinent, but I am still able to take her out . I make sure that she has a clean pad on before we go and take spare pads and clothing. You can buy RADAR keys for disabled toilets in case of accidents although it hasnt yet happened to me.

    If I cant take her out then I do her nails, which she loves and I also read to her from her childhood favourite books - Winnie the Pooh (including the poems) and Alice in Wonderland are particular favourites. Mum also likes the poems by Pam Ayres.

    Do photos upset her because they are of people that she cant remember? Would photos of scenes and/or objects from the past help with reminiscence? Talk about things from the past. Do you remember any old family stories that you could repeat to her? My mum still remembers them and if I start to tell her she will often join in and finish the story off. Even if she cant, they make her laugh and I think she does remember.
  6. Leolady63

    Leolady63 Registered User

    Jul 15, 2015
    I was able to take Mum out in the car although she was incontinent but it got worse. Unfortunately as she cannot stand without help I cannot take her in the car unless there is someone else to accompany me and she can't accept it. However, I do take her in the wheelchair across to a shopping centre and just ensure I notify the staff in the home so she is changed just beforehand and wears more absorbent pads. We've had "accidents" but theses things happen. I have found it very difficult to find things to do at the home apart from talk to her all the time. She has spells where she hardly responds and others where she's quite bright. She has a tv in her room and I take in dvds. She doesn't like sitting in the day room as the TV is on and too loud and no one to talk to. She does crocheting now and again and I bring her magazines. Mum also does her nails and gets her hair done regularly. There's now a new manageress who is very keen to try new things - encouraging volunteers to visit etc. Art therapy colouring books are something I've thought about but some look too intricate. Even try doing a crossword or puzzle together. Music seems to be good for people but Mum's not keen on cds - they seem to upset her. I'm going to suggest perhaps someone could bring in instruments for residents to try out in a wee music class?

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