Ideas for future accommodation

[Hermes]

Hello
Just joined up but I have been reading some of the forums and the kind, supportive folk who are part of them. I would welcome some thoughts to help with planning for the future.
Mum (mid 80's) recently diagnosed, lives alone in private flat, minimal neighbour interactions, church contacts but has never been a very sociable person.
Physically ok, and at the moment managing household tasks, buses, shopping. Happy in her flat.
3 children, 90 minutes drive away, 3 1/2 hours and 5 hours away.
Do we
1) Keep mum in her flat for as long as possible and start some support workers and increase as needed and use Telecare when needed. Then move into a care home near one of us when she can no longer manage.
2) Move her to sheltered accommodation near one of us now, so she has time to adjust before memory gets too bad to adapt. Then progress onto a care home.

Many thanks
Hermes

 

[marionq]

If your Mum is managing then don't do anything drastic. Introduce help gradually so she gets used to having another person around eg as a cleaner, cooking a light meal, giving medications, changing bed linen etc. Sell the idea as doing it to help you and your siblings so you won't worry about her so much and will be able to just enjoy her company when you see her.

If she deteriorates over the next six or twelve months then revisit the situation to see what would be best.

 

[nitram]

Is the flat she is now in rented or owned?

Are there what you consider to be good sheltered accommodation and care homes near you or one of your siblings?

 

[Hermes]

Good Ideas

Thank you for some good advice and for the review period, we will need to start the gradual introduction of support

If your Mum is managing then don't do anything drastic. Introduce help gradually so she gets used to having another person around eg as a cleaner, cooking a light meal, giving medications, changing bed linen etc. Sell the idea as doing it to help you and your siblings so you won't worry about her so much and will be able to just enjoy her company when you see her.

If she deteriorates over the next six or twelve months then revisit the situation to see what would be best.

 

[Hermes]

The flat is owned. Will need to investigate care options near me or my siblings, probably worth investigating sooner rather than later.

Thank you

Is the flat she is now in rented or owned?

Are there what you consider to be good sheltered accommodation and care homes near you or one of your siblings?

 

[Pete R]

Hi Hermes, only asking as you haven't said but have you asked your Mum what she would like to do? My Mom had made her mind up and my sister was well put out when she told her

Also whilst your Mum is able have you sorted POA?

Hope all goes well

 

[Hermes]

Yes ! I was planning to ask her, but I wanted to hear other people's experiences of what worked/didn't work for them.
Thanks for asking about POA, we have discovered there is one, although we don't remember signing it (oops)
Thanks
Hermes

Hi Hermes, only asking as you haven't said but have you asked your Mum what she would like to do? My Mom had made her mind up and my sister was well put out when she told her

Also whilst your Mum is able have you sorted POA?

Hope all goes well