I've posted on here few times, about my 85 yr old Mum who is in N/H since last Christmas. We live in southern Ireland & our youngest son got married in England 3 wks ago. I had asked my brother months ago, if he & his wife would look after her for the few days, if we took her over on the plane, as we were staying in a hotel & they live only an hour away. He said, they could sort something out. I spoke to him many times after that & was no mention of looking after our mum.
She got MRSA bug few weeks before the wedding, so she couldn't go anyway & the head nurse suggested not to take her as she would be confused. I accepted that, but didn't hear from my brother until a few days before the wedding & he asked me what had I decided to do. I said, what could I do, I didn't hear from you, then told him about the MRSA. My brother & his wife were at the wedding, but neither of them asked me how our Mum was, which really upset me, her having the MRSA. My son was even more upset, as neither of them spoke to his new wife or made an effort to say how she looked etc.
My son said to me, the next time we see them, will be at Nan's funeral. The last time my brother spoke to our Mum was Christmas day & I'm always ringing him. I've stopped now, then this eve my brother rang our landline. My husband answered & he was so chatty to my brother, who said he & his wife were going on holiday to Italy at the weekend. I was trying to say I didn't want to speak to him tonight, but my husband handed the phone to me. I found it so hard to be chatty, remembering how he & his wife were at our son's wedding. At the end of the conversation, he asked how our Mum's MRSA was, I said she had it when we were at the wedding. I get on well with my brother & wife, but I just couldn't talk to him properly tonight. I heard my husband say to him, have a great holiday, but I couldn't bring myself to say that to him. I didn't know if I should have told my brother, that I was upset he didn't ask how our mum was & that our son was also upset they hadn't talked to his new wife. I wasn't myself when I talked to him tonight, so I thought he would've noticed, then asked me. I could then have told him.
I have just had a row with my husband, as he said, I shouldn't be telling him what to say to my brother, that he will be friendly to him, if he chooses to be. He said, if he was annoyed with one of his brothers, he would expect me to still be nice to them. I hate confrontations with anyone & avoid them. My eldest son wanted to ring my Mum last week & I asked her if she got a call. She said, was it B ringing, meaning my brother. In her eyes, he can still do no wrong. My brother said, he'll ring us when they get back from holiday, which will be a surprise if he does. I just don't know how to deal with the situation, especially if it's affecting my husband & myself.
She got MRSA bug few weeks before the wedding, so she couldn't go anyway & the head nurse suggested not to take her as she would be confused. I accepted that, but didn't hear from my brother until a few days before the wedding & he asked me what had I decided to do. I said, what could I do, I didn't hear from you, then told him about the MRSA. My brother & his wife were at the wedding, but neither of them asked me how our Mum was, which really upset me, her having the MRSA. My son was even more upset, as neither of them spoke to his new wife or made an effort to say how she looked etc.
My son said to me, the next time we see them, will be at Nan's funeral. The last time my brother spoke to our Mum was Christmas day & I'm always ringing him. I've stopped now, then this eve my brother rang our landline. My husband answered & he was so chatty to my brother, who said he & his wife were going on holiday to Italy at the weekend. I was trying to say I didn't want to speak to him tonight, but my husband handed the phone to me. I found it so hard to be chatty, remembering how he & his wife were at our son's wedding. At the end of the conversation, he asked how our Mum's MRSA was, I said she had it when we were at the wedding. I get on well with my brother & wife, but I just couldn't talk to him properly tonight. I heard my husband say to him, have a great holiday, but I couldn't bring myself to say that to him. I didn't know if I should have told my brother, that I was upset he didn't ask how our mum was & that our son was also upset they hadn't talked to his new wife. I wasn't myself when I talked to him tonight, so I thought he would've noticed, then asked me. I could then have told him.
I have just had a row with my husband, as he said, I shouldn't be telling him what to say to my brother, that he will be friendly to him, if he chooses to be. He said, if he was annoyed with one of his brothers, he would expect me to still be nice to them. I hate confrontations with anyone & avoid them. My eldest son wanted to ring my Mum last week & I asked her if she got a call. She said, was it B ringing, meaning my brother. In her eyes, he can still do no wrong. My brother said, he'll ring us when they get back from holiday, which will be a surprise if he does. I just don't know how to deal with the situation, especially if it's affecting my husband & myself.