I think things look better now


Registered User
Jun 29, 2007
North Wales
Have been absent from TP for quite a while.

Dee declined very sharply after Christmas and it's been a roller coaster ride.

Those who know me will remember that I was very badly treated by Soc Services just before Christmas. Because I am self funding the S Worker refused point blank to help in a real emergency. In March I wrote a letter to the Complaints Officer of the County and had instant response. He came to see me the day he received my letter to apologise and he was followed by the appropriate Head of S Services, then I received a letter of apology saying the SW was wrong. Since then they have really tried to help and everything is being handled in a friendly manner.

So my message is: find the right person to complaint to and DO IT.

Also, get an assessment done and take time over it and don't pull any punches. Mine has just been done by the Alz Soc Support Officer who is permitted to do this in lieu of the Soc W and she was so helpful.

Dee is now spending two days a week in a Care Home (10 to 6pm), one day at the clinic for their respite day and am using an agency to help with toileting in the morning and for respite one afternoon each week. And will soon be having evening toileting as well. I am self funding but the Soc S have been as helpful as they can with some of the costs. And they covered my absence when seeing a consultant.

But unfortunately, Dee is v incontinent and can be difficult to deal with in some situations. However she remains a very nice person in those fleeting moments when she is not troubled by this dreadful disease.

Hope to come back to TP now that things are settling down again.

Best wishes to everyone,

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
Believe it or not Cliff, I nearly put a notice on TP to ask if anyone had heard from you.

Thank you for getting in touch. I`m so sorry Dee has gone downhill but glad your letter was successful in getting the appropriate response.

I do hope some things are easier for you Cliff, but I can see there are many very difficulties.

Please keep in contact with TP whenever you are able. You have a lot of friends here.

Love xx


Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
SW Scotland
Hi Cliff, I missed you too!:)

I'm sorry Dee has declined so much, it's so distressing, isn't it?

Well done for getting SS to sit up and take notice, it sounds as if you have a good care plan there.

I hope things continue to go smoothly for you both. Kep in touch.


Kate P

Registered User
Jul 6, 2007
Dear Cliff,

I'm so sorry to hear about Dee's decline but it's good to hear that SS have pulled their finger out and started to offer you some help.

I hope you're taking advantage of that help and using it to relax and look after yourself - you're important too remember!:)


Registered User
Mar 7, 2004
Dear Cliff, thank you for taking the time to update us about Dee, and to explain why you have not been so active on TP.

(You have been missed).

It is not an easy road we travel, so I am glad that you are getting some help. Please stay in touch.


Registered User
Nov 28, 2005
Hello Cliff:
Thank you for updating us regarding Dee. You have had a tough time and I hope all the services you have now are helping you feel a little more relaxed. It is a wretched disease and the sadness is knowing that we all have to face these deteriorations.

I do hope Dee is fairly contented as that will help you too.

Keep us posted! Best wishes Jan


Registered User
Sep 27, 2006
I'm so sorry to read of your wife's decline and I do hope that the measures you have now put in place give you some rest from the unrelenting care. Well done for insisting on your rights with the Social Service Dept in your area. That must have been one huge stress you could have well done without. xx TinaT


Registered User
Nov 7, 2004
Hi Cliff

Very pleased to hear that your persistence with Social Services paid off.

It is a valuable lesson for us all.

All the best



Registered User
Jun 29, 2007
North Wales
Have just read all your kind remarks before looking at the threads.

It's quite overwhelming to read them. When you get so tired you believe you are the only one dealing with this evil disease but there are so many with it much worse.

Thank you all,

Love to everyone and strength for what you are doing.


Registered User
Apr 15, 2007
Dear Cliff,

Sorry to read that things have deteriorated with Dee but pleased that things are improving in the way of support.

I truly hope things continue to go in your favour.

Best Wishes, Taffy.