My husband was diagnosed with Alzheimers in January 2021 although it had been obvious for at least 2 years that something was very wrong. I feel desperate , bereft, overwhelmed, angry and out of control. I lose control with him and feel hatred at times but also pity for him. He can hardly find any words at all and is not very lucid when he does manage to find words. yesterday he was about to pour milk into the toaster but I managed to stop him. So many things are happening now to make me feel as if this life is so dreadful. I know he is ill l but how do I accept these things without becoming this vile person. I have two married sons who live in Rickmansworth; their lives are busy as they have their own family and are a support at times but not around very much. All our friends are miles away and old anyway with their own problems. Could someone give me some advice on how to accept this and the depression as I cry every day.