1. Madusa

    Madusa Registered User

    Aug 15, 2014
    13
    My MIL has vascular dementia and after being told by her daughter in October last year that she would decorate the kitchen for her, waited patiently until January and then stripped the kitchen. Her daughter went out to buy the wallpaper for her, painted 1 skirting board and a door frame then told Mum that my husband and I would have to do it as she couldn't paint doors and ceiling and that she was no good at papering! We work for ourselves so after arranging a bit of time and working extra hours, we started the decorating of the kitchen, it took us 2 days. Unfortunately during this time after we had left she stripped her 2 hallways, and her daughter appeared with a big bag of wallpaper, not to be seen again! We were left to do the 2 hallways which put our own work load behind, as well as injuring my knee and pulling all the muscles in my back. We left her with strict instructions not to strip any more walls for the next few weeks as we had a mountain of orders to fullfill and we wouldn't have any time to decorate. Just started back tackling the work load this week, (forget about the housework, shopping, washing and ironing) and had to take Mum to a Doctors appointment today, I walked in, the dado rail has been ripped out of the wall in the front room and the wall paper has started to be stripped, the bathroom is half stripped (she couldn't reach the top bit) and there is a second hand hessian backed carpet piled in the middle of the floor, supposedly for the bathroom. I questioned why she had done this and she said 'have you brought your scissors to fit the carpet in the bathroom, but before you do that you can gloss and hang the paper'! I told her we couldn't do anything for a few more weeks yet and she just told me we WOULD find the time oh and as well we might as well do the bedroom while we are at it.
    The daughter meanwhile has taken a week off work, her contribution....nil! I have told my OH that I will do it but she is going to have to be patient and wait until I can find the time (my OH has just come out of hospital and is not allowed to lift or stretch so its down to me again). He said she won't wait and will try to do it on her own,it has caused friction between us today, we are slowly running out of money and if I delay anymore orders we will start to lose our customers. All the while the daughter is enjoying life to the full, if I don't SCREAM I will CRY!!!!!!:mad:

    Sorry for the rant, I know your the only people who understand
     
  2. marionq

    marionq Registered User

    Apr 24, 2013
    5,901
    Female
    Scotland
    Do not do another stroke! Tell her you are employing someone to do it and she must pay them. That might stop her stripping walls and if not she will have to live with it. Stop being blackmailed now.

    Be strong.
     
  3. PeggySmith

    PeggySmith Registered User

    Apr 16, 2012
    1,683
    BANES
    Well said, Marionq. Find a local decorator and get a quote asap.
     
  4. ellejay

    ellejay Registered User

    Jan 28, 2011
    4,015
    Essex
    I second what Marion said.

    If your husband is worried his mother will start trying to do the work herself, tell him to sort it with his sister ( perhaps she'd like to go halves with her mother paying a decorator)

    Lin x
     
  5. Madusa

    Madusa Registered User

    Aug 15, 2014
    13
    You know, and this might seem daft, but I hadn't thought of getting in a decorator :) It might stop her stripping if I use it as a threat as she doesn't like 'strangers' in her house, the problem I have though is she can get violent, lashing out with slaps and punches for no apparent reason........I wonder how many decorators will put up with that :rolleyes:
     
  6. Onlyme

    Onlyme Registered User

    Apr 5, 2010
    4,995
    UK
    Could your husband pop in every so often to check on workmen or divert his phone and work from hers for a couple of days? Short of trussing her up (joke) I have no idea what to do. It must be so depressing for you to walk into that mess.
     
  7. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,815
    UK
    Does she really blast out orders to you like that!!!! Pity her partner.
     
  8. Tin

    Tin Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    4,815
    UK
    Sorry, misunderstood your thread, I thought the sister was talking to you about the decorating to be done.
     

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